Ohio State C Harry Miller opens up about his mental health struggles

As a society, we are beginning to open up the discussion of mental health--maybe it's one of the silver linings of the pandemic.  As the parent of a daughter who battles similar demons, the resources to fight this illness are incredibly constrained.  My attitude toward mental illness has undergone a complete change once immersed in the problem.  I hope stories like the one Harry Miller shared help our society collectively realize the need for understanding and investment in this space, so fewer have to learn the hard way as I did. 

As a licensed (currently not practicing) counselor, I think people don't truly understand how many people struggle with this stuff.

I do a good job of trying to be silly and sometimes (often!) annoying on here because I find it enjoyable- however, I have never shared that I have some pretty serious mental health struggles myself. There are days when I do not know how I get to the next day. If you see me in the outside world, you would never, ever guess what my struggles are.

To the people who aren't licensed and want to help someone, just listen. Listen to that person who you disagree with, makes you angry, bores you, whatever. Just listening may help that person get through the day because it's very likely they don't have people at home to talk to. 

And if you EVER suspect that a person may be thinking about hurting themselves, ASK THAT PERSON. It is a total myth that asking a person if they are thinking about hurting themselves will actually lead to that outcome. Understand that self-harm is not some spontaneous action; it is built upon years and years of struggles. And then if the answer is yes, DO NOT FREAK OUT. Be calm. Tell that individual you will help them get help- refer them to someone who can. And if you aren't sure who to call, call 911. Just ask someone. It's ok not to have the answers. But there is someone who does.

Damn. That is heart-wrenching. I hope he continues the fight and stays healthy.

That was a hell of a read.  I’m very glad he had the support he needed, sounds like Ryan Day and the program really came through for him.

As someone whose been down that road and back a couple times, please please please remember to reach out if you are thinking about hurting yourself.  There are people who love you more than you know and they’ll move mountains to help you 

Kudos to Harry and all those at OSU who supported him. Fortunately he didn't go as far as the Stanford goalkeeper, who also was a very accomplished and intelligent student athlete in a challenging academic program. A 4.0 ME is no small feat.

Having more open dialogue, listening, and offering unconditional help without judgment is a start.

I know nothing about this case, and it may not apply at all to either of the cases mentioned above, but every time someone bitches about concussion protocol or doesn't think the misuse of opioids isn't a big deal in big time athletics, is being naive. The NCAA and NFL need to do more to support the physical and mental well being of all their athletes.

Thank you for sharing FrankMurphy, it's imperative we as a society take mental wellness as seriously as we take our physical health (which, we could also do better with, but that's another conversation). These kids are put under an immense amount of pressure, under a microscope for all to see.. playing a sport at a level most of us couldn't dream of playing at. Harry Miller's tweet should be a beacon for all athletes with mental illness to seek help, and I'm grateful he played at OSU for Ryan Day who's personally experienced suicide and takes mental illness very seriously. I would guess many of us are old enough to have "suck it up", or "deal with it" ingrained in our minds from playing sports in our youth, I just hope those of you who are parents with young children, like me, take this illness seriously. I know I never realized how serious this issue was until some very good friends of mine began dealing with it with their children. I blame social media, but that's also another conversation. God Bless to those who are struggling.

Damn. Good on Ryan Day for being so supportive.

Good on him - i know there’s (rightly) less of a stigma about mental health these days, but it still takes true bravery to come forward and bare your soul to the world like this. Best of luck young man

Everyone was wondering what was wrong with him, some were very impatient with how our line was performing and wanted him in the game. We had no idea what was happening. Harry was the top-ranked Center coming out of high school and started in 2019. People had no idea what he was going through. Gotta applaud the guy for coming out and delivering that powerful message even if you’re on the opposite side of the rivalry. Hopefully players across the nation can look at this and have the courage to get help and face their problems and find themselves. Have a great night everyone and please call the hotline if you need help.

Let's put the rivalry aside for a moment.

The fact you had to put this in the OP scares me. Who is the dipshit Michigan "fan" who reads what Harry Miller is going through and doesn't feel for him? 

I'm glad he is OK and posted it. 

Michigan losing today doesn't seem that big of a deal now.

Good on them both. I hope he continues to get the help he needs, and I hope others are encouraged to seek out help. We all need it at times, and could use it more often than we'd like to admit. 

I have to ask:

I wonder how much of his struggles are due to his position.

OL and DL are super high-risk for CTE, and a lifetime of brain injury does mental health 0 good.

I'm glad to hear that his network kicked in immediately, no questions asked, and he got assistance, and I hope ALL institutions, athletic, academic, or professional, can take mental health with the gravity it deserves.

It is incredible that Harry shared this with the world.  That is no small feat.  I hope a lot of people see it and take it to heart.

It is also fantastic that Ryan Day reacted the way he did.  I don't think all coaches would have been able to recognize the issue and address it, but he did and he should be commended for it.

I think Harry touches on one of the most insidious things about depression and mental health issues - that they exist often in spite of, and not because of, what is happening externally.  He is incredibly successful and has an incredible future and yet he struggles.  I think a lot of folks who haven't experienced true depression have a very difficult time grasping this, since it is so counterintuitive, but at the times when outwardly it seems like you have everything to live for, depression nevertheless stalks you.  It really is frightening.

Super heartbreaking to read this. We all have our own demons. Some lesser than others. I practice to be there and have a listening ear to everyone around me as you never know that one interaction could alter one’s life. I think with todays society and the constant demand from a boss, fan, whomever, has really hindered the impact of mental health. Also believe social media has been one of the worst inventions of all time, as it makes mental health bad. I hope anyone that has/is struggling knows that their closest friend, family etc is there for them. Big ups for Miller for opening this up and creating a spotlight to battle this stigma. 

Having lost my son 8 years ago who at the time was a U of M student this really hits close to home. It takes a lot of courage to say you need help. My son did a few times before giving up the battle. I can't begin to tell you how important it is to do everything you can possibly do to help somebody in need. The pain of losing a child or any loved one to suicide affects so many lives and for so long. It was my sons birthday last weekend and a very difficult day for both my wife and I. That pain just never goes away. I hope this young man continues to battle and to seek help whenever he needs it.  

I'm plagued by existential dread and intrusive thoughts. Horrific shit that I can't keep out of my mind.  If I keep busy and distracted then it goes away, but it's always there ready to appear out of nowhere. I've wondered if that's depression or something else.  I've never really talked to anyone about it.  I have so much to live for and I think the fear of losing everything or the fact that the best case scenario is that I'll gradually age/decay and every day is one day closer to death. Along the way I'll be forced to see everyone I love die.  Either that or I'll die earlier and not get to see my all loved ones grow and spend time with them. Happiness and health is fleeting and we all eventually are alone in our death and pain and frantic realization the world will go on forever without us and we'll be totally forgotten in a few generations. No one gives a shit about their great great grandparents. They're a faint whisper that's barely there. The world dismisses live like it's worthless. Drop a bomb here. Shoot a missle there. Fuck those people over there.  Maybe it is worthless.  Those moments of pure joy sure are great, but they'll be cold comfort on your death bed.  No amount of woo woo spiritual religious talk helps.  It just introduces another obstacle of blind faith and mental gymnastics to convince yourself of something with limited evidence. It offers no real hope.  All I can do is cling to the moments of joy I have and try to bury the lurking darkness for as long as possible knowing eventually it will take me and everyone with it.

I know we're not allowed to say anything nice about Ohio State coach Ryan Day, but he may have helped save Harry Miller's life. Kudos to Coach Day and to Harry Miller for continuing to fight the good fight, and getting the help that he needs. As a 4.0 GPA engineering student and a high level college athlete, it is understandable that Miller (or any human being) might struggle to sustain that level of accomplishment and need to seek help.

Well said

My wife is the "go to" mental health provider in a six person pediatric office-sees more kids for this than the other five combined. This is a significant and growing matter we as a society are experiencing and the stressors families face continue to increase. And the hard truth here is that the available mental health services continue to decrease-both in quantity and quality. The socioeconomic factors that drive this malady are receiving no redress in the larger society. Lip service does not solve this matter-and that is the only things that is increasing. 

Thank you for sharing this. Not sure I would have seen it otherwise. 

MGoFriends, I am quite sure some of us have struggled like this as well, as Uncle  Leo noted - I have too. Harry is a role model for talking to someone and for sharing. It’s what got me through too. Kudos to Ryan Day for his support. If you or someone you know is in this same place, reach out. 

The brain and human interaction are wildly powerful, which we can use to help each other when we pause long enough to see each other. Godspeed, Harry. 

Thank you, Harry, for having the courage to share your story, and I'm glad you've gotten the help you need. And major kudos to Coach Day as well. I know we all like to talk a bit of smack about him after the results on November 27th, but he may very well have saved this young man's life. The impact he just had here is far more important than anything he ever could've done for anyone on the field. 

If you ever even remotely feel like you need help, there is no shame whatsoever in asking for it. No one should ever feel like they need to "suck it up" or "tough it out." Even if you think its nothing, even just talking to someone, anyone, is better than doing nothing or hoping it goes away. 

A very close friend is still alive because his mother happened to call while he had a pile of pills laid out on the table in front of him. He told his mother "now's not a good time" and hung up the phone. She sensed something was wrong and called the cops, who knocked on his door shortly thereafter. He is now doing very well 12 years later. 

If you suspect anything, call someone or get over there yourself.