Everything Sucks NEGBANG

Submitted by Wolverinefan84 on November 25th, 2018 at 7:56 AM

Today is a bad day. All hope is lost. CFP dreams turned into nightmares. Our beloved coach got out-coached. Our beloved DC got shredded. We put up a dud on the biggest stage, and that makes me sad. Everything sucks so this calls for a good ole-fashioned NEGBANG.

ijohnb

November 25th, 2018 at 8:04 AM ^

Death. Terminal illness. Torture.  War. Divorce. Oil spills.  Hurricanes.  Deep hangnails.  Hitting your head really hard on a sharp corner. Fatal car accidents.  

 

Death.

Craptain Crunch

November 25th, 2018 at 8:18 AM ^

Not all sucks. Michigan will go to a bowl game. But we did learn Michigan isn't really as good as we all thought. Michigan is like a girl we dated 10 times but never fooled around with until the 11th date when we realized she has a twig and berries. 

titanfan11

November 25th, 2018 at 9:08 AM ^

No no no...the first time you met her, you thought she looked good but was a pretty awful person.  You kept running into her at different bars though (10 more times in fact), and she just kept seeming better and better.  Finally, the 12th time you ran into her, you both were like "Let's do this."  Unfortunately, while hooking up, her time of the month started, and it was a bloodbath from there!   (too much?)

His Dudeness

November 25th, 2018 at 8:20 AM ^

Zach Braff, Real Housewives, Detroit Lions, diarrhea, parsley, upcharge for a neat pour, clowns, the office Debrah (everyone has one), moles, male pattern baldness, ice storms, Urban Meyer, Kardashians, ingrown hairs. 

His Dudeness

November 25th, 2018 at 8:30 AM ^

She wear those really thin sweatpants and claim they're pants because they have some flower pattern? She smell like ham? She know how to do maybe one thing and complain about it always? She equate literally any request of her to a "big can of worms?" She always the first one to the cake? Last one to the meeting? Yeah... I've known many Debbies. 

itsinyormouth

November 25th, 2018 at 8:26 AM ^

jive ass program. all hype no substance.

complete joke.

Mich will start next year ranked top 5 though, gift.

garbage program

KC Wolve

November 25th, 2018 at 8:34 AM ^

I wasn’t as confident as a lot of other people around here, but I let myself believe that this was going to be the year. I didn’t even care about a playoff spot. Just beat OSU and with the Big. Fuck all.  I think I liked it better when UM had no real chance and a close game was a surprise. Also, basketball is stupid and now I have nothing to watch besides the Chiefs (who will also crush my soul eventually) until baseball starts in April. 

Fuck Sports

Dayton Blue

November 25th, 2018 at 8:37 AM ^

Michigan is all about "the hole that Crisler dug, Canham carpeted and Bo filled."  Michigan football is just a punchline to keep the seats filled.  Michigan is a very well-marketed brand with gullible fans who are starting to realize this is just what the NYT wrote, an "elegantly managed decline."

His Dudeness

November 25th, 2018 at 9:12 AM ^

This is so 100% true it makes me deeply sad. Why we keep coming out to watch phony wins and claim big victories is beyond me. It's all so fake. All those cheers and all that talk about how this year is different for this at the end of every year? It's all very stupid. 

Erik_in_Dayton

November 25th, 2018 at 8:45 AM ^

Michigan will probably never beat Urban Meyer. The Game is a farce. The Beatles wrote a lot of annoying songs. Smart phones have probably caused a net loss to our society. The NFL is largely atrocious. We are now a country that celebrates ignorance. And China owns all of our giant pandas.

killerseafood3

November 25th, 2018 at 8:53 AM ^

The game sucked. My 13 year old dog, who recently had a clean bill of health, had a mass on his liver that exploded and I had to put him down late last night. All in all, fuck yesterday. Fuck it all to hell. 

freelion

November 25th, 2018 at 8:54 AM ^

Warde Manuel should petition the Big 10 to allow us to move to the West division where we can have a chance at winning the division. Otherwise we will never have a chance to play in the Big 10 championship game

BlueLine

November 25th, 2018 at 8:57 AM ^

Being a Michigan football fan is starting to feel like a read through Steven King's The Dark Tower series. It's awesome and wonderful and an amazing journey. You become infatuated with the characters and world King has created. The hero finally makes it to the end of his quest, and then the end happens.

Yesterday felt like how I felt reading that last chapter. How I imagine Roland must have felt. Not again. Not again.

llandson

November 25th, 2018 at 9:21 AM ^

It is profoundly stupid that the two best teams in the Big Ten will not and cannot play for the Big Ten Championship. Such an easy fix, too. Fairer to the players, and more money for the conference.