OT: To No One’s Surprise... the New Star Wars Movie Sucks
Kathleen Kennedy, Rian Johnson and JJ Abrams succeeded in making a trilogy worse than the prequels. I’m impressed. Truly. Kennedy, as Brian would say in reference to Jim Delaney, is just in charge for the sake of being charge of stuff. The fact that she had no roadmap for this trilogy and let Johnson shit all over the already non-creative foundation Abrams made from episode 7 only to back track with superficial nostalgia ridden tropes in this one as an “apology” reeks of desperation and classic Disney garbage.
She needs to be gone yesterday.
On the bright side, we’re done with the Skywalker story finally. Maybe we can get some Old Republic movies (KOTOR fans stand up) which are by far the best stories in the Star Wars universe.
Overall summary of the new series
Episode 7: Re-hash of Episode 4 but okay foundation with plenty of mystery to explore
Episode 8: LOL WHAT MYSTERY
Episode 9: Exposition nightmare filled with nostalgic tropes and Mary Sue tendencies to the point of 0 tension and horrible pacing.
Adam Driver wins MVP but his character was poorly done and not even a threat since they de-pantsed him from the jump. Daisy Ridley is a good actor but her character is as about as interesting as cardboard and is the most boring heroine in movie history. Nothing she does makes sense and she’s strong just because . No hero cycle. Just superficial nonsense to win brownie points with certain demographics.
TLDR: New Star Wars is bad. Kennedy needs to be fired for not having a plan in place for proper character development and story. Actors put in tough spots due to shitty script.
December 20th, 2019 at 9:07 AM ^
So, you're giving it two thumbs up?
December 20th, 2019 at 9:19 AM ^
I think it's more of a Tom Herman-esque two fingers up rating.
December 20th, 2019 at 9:59 AM ^
You mean Michelle Herman - "OK, cool hook 'em"
December 20th, 2019 at 11:29 AM ^
Who is she?
December 20th, 2019 at 4:30 PM ^
December 20th, 2019 at 9:09 AM ^
Addendum:
I think the worst part about Last Jedi is the fact that it influenced D&D to ruin Game of Thrones to with the HURR DURR JUST SUBVERTING EXPECTATIONS FOR THE SAKE OF IT WITH NO DEFERENCE TO PLOT OR 7 SEASONS WORTH OF CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT schtick in Season 8.
Still can’t get over that waste of time. Here’s to The Witcher being good on Netflix. Got high hopes after the games. Trailers seem iffy tho.
December 20th, 2019 at 9:58 AM ^
This triology was screwed from the very start because, in a rush to get it out as soon as possible, there was absolutely no master plan or overarching idea of what it was doing.
They gave JJ the first one (the last SW film I’ve seen BTW) and he proceeded to just throw as much random shit as possible on the screen to stir up mystery and intrigue.
Then they gave the second one to a totally different style of director who decided to do the exact opposite, or completely just ignore, all the things JJ did in the first one. All for the sake of “subverting expectations.”
Then they go back to JJ in the third one to undo all the things Rian Johnson did in the second one. Plus the fact JJ has NEVER been good at bring his plot points to strong and satisfying conclusions.
Love or hate Marvel, you have to admire how everything from Iron Man to Endgame was planned to unfold over a 10 year arc. Hell, even the SW prequels at least had a master story plan in place even if the execution was awful.
December 20th, 2019 at 10:02 AM ^
Yep, giving the guy who did Lost anything requiring moving forward to an ending is an exercise in futility.
December 20th, 2019 at 10:11 AM ^
JJ is the fucking master at starting interesting plot threads that really grab your attention and make you wonder what’s going to happen. Only for him to have no clue how to end it and either just ignore it, or create the most ridiculously contrived plot either devices, to resolve everything.
December 20th, 2019 at 10:14 AM ^
But Abrams wasn't really a part of Lost past season 1, and even then, he didn't have much input overall past developing the concept and the 2 part pilot.
Lindeloff was mostly the driving force and showrunner in season 1 and then Cuse joined him post season 1 for the remained of the show's run.
We can't blame JJA for what lost became over the years and how it ended.
Writing this all out, I am shocked that the guy who pissed away a phenomenal concept and first handful of seasons, somehow was able to give us the masterpiece that was Watchmen.
That show was so deep and nuanced and incredible.
December 20th, 2019 at 10:19 AM ^
Regardless, one of JJ’s major MOs has always been to introduce these grand and mysterious ideas and, when it comes time for the audience payoff, to just say “Uh, oh yeah it was all magic or some kind of shit like that.”
If he’d written “The Usual Suspects” Keyser Soze would have just turned out to be an imaginary phantom that only existed in the characters’ heads, because, reasons
December 20th, 2019 at 10:37 AM ^
Do you have any other examples, besides Lost?
It doesn't seem fair to blame how Lost ended up on him?
I mean, unless your argument is that when Lost was developed, JJA should have already had the entirety of the plot outlined through x amount of seasons, and had the endgame realized.
I mean, it seems to me that he was asked to take the concept of "Survivor the series" and develop an actual drama out of it, which he did, and then the showrunning duties were turned out for LindelCuse.
He didn't introduce all the cool and interesting subplots and intricate details of the people on the island (like the others and the Dharma Initiative and the stations and shit).
I am curious what other examples you may have, because honestly, I don't know myself but would love to learn
December 20th, 2019 at 10:51 AM ^
The Star Trek films, Super 8, Alias, Cloverfield.
December 20th, 2019 at 10:55 AM ^
100% co-sign. Great premise/starts leading to meandering/horrible finishes.
December 20th, 2019 at 12:38 PM ^
Except that there is absolutely nothing meandering nor horrible about Super8, and the Trek films move along and end reasonably well too.
December 20th, 2019 at 3:56 PM ^
First Trek film good, subsequent ones bad.
Super8 was AWESOME for about 3/4 of it before it ended with a whimper.
December 20th, 2019 at 7:26 PM ^
You mean the Star Trek films where, in the first. a magic red substance does things and Kirk gets command of the Enterprise, not through years of dedication and sacrifice, but because Spock can’t hack it as captain......And the second one with (hee, hee) Super blood.
Yeah those were all totally well thought out and executed plots.
December 20th, 2019 at 12:51 PM ^
You also forgot JJ's best series, Fringe, which was actually quite well thought out and developed over the seasons.
December 20th, 2019 at 4:35 PM ^
I thought fringe was amazing how well the last seasons interwove with the first. Haven't been overly impressed with anything since.
December 21st, 2019 at 9:39 PM ^
December 21st, 2019 at 9:37 PM ^
December 20th, 2019 at 7:56 PM ^
Fringe
December 20th, 2019 at 10:41 AM ^
Episodes 7-9 are a great example of how not to create a trilogy. The fact that they didn't have an overall plan going in is flat out crazy, especially considering how much Disney paid for the IP.
December 20th, 2019 at 11:31 AM ^
especially considering how much Disney paid for the IP
This is going to sound cynical but do you think Disney paid for the IP to have a master plan? Or to create a vehicle to separate one from as much of their money as quickly as possible?
Disney is masters at 'B'.
My take on this is Star Wars is simply another asset in the Disney portfolio.
December 20th, 2019 at 7:32 PM ^
Disney had this plan that they were going to crank out new series films every odd year and stand alone ones even year and, goddamn it, we’re doing it come hell or high water.
They thought SW was this inexhaustible resource that could be used as frivolously as needed, without any regard for quality, and now they’re paying the price for that arrogance.
December 21st, 2019 at 2:04 AM ^
I think they had a 'If we make films they will come' mentality. That those of us who enjoyed Star Wars growing up would just flock to see whatever crap that put on film.
I saw every SW film first run in the theaters, it all came to an end after 'The Last Jedi'. Forget it.
December 20th, 2019 at 10:55 AM ^
Kennedy isn’t a fan of the Star Wars franchise and has no business being in charge of it. That was mistake number one.
Rian Johnson never should have touched the second one. They would have been better off going with the Highlander 3 approach, and just pretend the second movie didn’t exist.
December 20th, 2019 at 7:35 PM ^
There’s a reason Kennedy was strictly a money person on films like Jurassic Park and Indiana Jones series. It’s because she not a good storyteller and has no clue how to make a film from the creative end.
December 20th, 2019 at 12:00 PM ^
Love or hate Marvel, you have to admire how everything from Iron Man to Endgame was planned to unfold over a 10 year arc.
I think anyone who is interested in storytelling, or wants to make a living from storytelling has to love how Marvel planned and executed that entire arc. I'm struggling to think of any significant missteps they had from 2008 to 2018. There really isn't a good comparison.
If one of the principals wrote a book about this entire run I would buy it in a heartbeat.
December 20th, 2019 at 12:42 PM ^
For those of us who grew up as Star Wars kids, the idea that a string of movies based on Marvel comic book characters would so convincingly and thoroughly be done better (on all fronts) than a contemporaneous Star Wars trilogy is just about mind-boggling. And yet here we are.
December 20th, 2019 at 6:29 PM ^
Marvel mistake: Wade Wilson/Weapon XI/Deadpool.
They entertainingly cleaned this up in Deadpool 2.
December 20th, 2019 at 10:44 PM ^
Ah, good catch.
The intro of Wade Wilson in the elevator into the dictator's office scene was terrific, but the final fight around the nuclear reactor was awful.
December 20th, 2019 at 10:07 AM ^
why the CAPS, just for emphasis?
December 20th, 2019 at 10:11 AM ^
Tone shift to mimic what was probably going through their minds.
December 20th, 2019 at 10:13 AM ^
ahh, thanks.
December 20th, 2019 at 10:11 AM ^
Haven't seen the current one yet, but tempted to think you're right since it seems you agree with the objectively true statement that The Last Jedi was bad mostly because it "subverted expectations" to no end and made stupid choices. However I've seen a few reviews that state that Rise of Sky "runs away" from TLJ and is "eager to please" the fans--which to me are two very good things.
December 20th, 2019 at 11:22 AM ^
Looking forward to Dune next year. Praying they don't screw it up and finally make the film the book deserves.
December 20th, 2019 at 11:39 AM ^
It's a tough book to film. That said I love the care they seem to be taking with it. I must admit I am VERY intrigued to see Timothy Chalmet try to carry off multiple fight scenes as the dude looks like he could get blown over by a not particularly stiff wind.
December 20th, 2019 at 5:03 PM ^
I thought the same until I saw him in "The King." After watching that I could definitely see him as Paul Atreides.
Hoping to finally get at least a good version of a great story.
December 20th, 2019 at 12:22 PM ^
I'm looking forward to it as well, but I'd feel much more comfortable about it if it was a high-budget miniseries or even a full-blown HBO show than a single feature film.
December 20th, 2019 at 11:23 AM ^
Reviews don't sound promising for Witcher. Sounds like its being defended by the people who were already fans of the franchise because they really want it to be good. Not a good sign.
December 20th, 2019 at 6:35 PM ^
Ive watched 2 episodes of the Witcher. Thought it was pretty good.
Have no interest in seeing Rise of Skywalker. I love the original trilogy. Last Jedi killed it for me. Thing is I liked Luke being grizzled and a man who had lost his faith. Some of the new ideas seemed interesting but then they did a bunch of stupid shit.
December 20th, 2019 at 9:10 AM ^
Haven’t watched one in my life. Always seemed nerdy af.
December 20th, 2019 at 9:12 AM ^
You post on a blog about high schoolers and 18-22 year olds’ decisions regarding playing a game.
Yeah not nerdy.
December 20th, 2019 at 9:25 AM ^
When have I posted about anyone’s decisions? I’ve never posted on a high schoolers decisions to my knowledge. Accusations are norm I get it, but no proof. Even if I did, posting about football is not nerdy. Watching Star Wars is. Opinions, that’s my game, what’s yours?
December 20th, 2019 at 9:47 AM ^
Sports nerds are nerds.
December 20th, 2019 at 9:53 AM ^
This is a dumb argument all around, but it took all of 2 seconds to find you called someone at OSU (I assume Fields) "chugadick can't run or pass". Quibble if you want about the age cutoff if you want, but talking about how other people play sports and insulting them doesn't make you not "nerdy" just because you say it does.
December 20th, 2019 at 10:38 AM ^
I'm sorry, but there is literally no difference between fans of Star Wars and fans of sports aside from the base subject matter. Actually, there is a difference; since I've found people who are fans of Star Wars and science fiction in general, to be, for the most part, open-minded and respectful of other peoples perspectives and interests; whereas the most passionate sports fans seem to be meatheads who have to deride anybody who don't share their worldview.
People who want to point and laugh dersively at this:
But don't see anything wrong with this:
Are myopic assholes...
