CFB Risk - Final Day - We Cannot Underestimate OSU
BeerBatteredAg's Stream (https://www.twitch.tv/beerbatteredag)
Krrrsten, our fearless leader, will be on this stream TONIGHT at 8:45 PM ET. Tune in to hear about how she adapted to bring us to the precipice of victory.
CliffsNotes Instructions
(1) If you want an order aligned with Michigan’s current battle plan before you attack/defend, go to Michigan Risk Central Command. You'll (usually) get a few options to choose from.
(2) If you insist on doing your own thing, head over to CFB Risk and attack Ohio State in the southwest, Mexico, or the Caribbean based on your favorite C.J. Stroud L:
- Southwest: Everybody had the flu, but he doesn't "make excuses"
- Mexico: Desmond Howard protects C.J. from Hutchinson on the Heisman stage
- Caribbean: Desperation heave right to Upshaw (only INT in 4-year Michigan career) to end comeback effort
Won't Get Fooled Again
One more day to play. We are in a great position, and the Orders website's numbers are looking good. In any sane universe, we should have this in the bag.
We do not live in a sane universe.
We were also in great shape in Version 2, but then OSU's recruiting machine turned on the afterburners. Hundreds of Bucknuts infested the board and victory was snatched from us.
That recruiting machine is still operational, but -- like The Who -- we know better now. Today is not the day to revel in victory. Today is one last opportunity to push.
Living Up To Our Reputation
BeerAg created this detailed guide about Risk after Texas A&M won in Version 1. In the next version of it, our recruiting strategy will be highlighted. The gist? Our community (i.e. y'all) came up huge by recruiting friends, family, etc., and that decentralized approach turned us into the juggernaut we are now.
Our mission is to put an exclamation point on that story. Y'all have probably seen MacGyver's graphic to recruit more Wolverine troops (shared below). Send that to your closest friends. Send it to your siblings. Send it to whoever with this simple pitch:
"We're trying to wreck OSU in this online game. It's easy to play and you only have to do it once."
Or use whatever pitch works well for you. Either way, just get a couple people to put in moves. If even a fraction of our huge player base does that, it will be that much harder for the Bucknuts to pull a miracle win.
And if you don't want to put in that kind of work, just make sure you PUT IN YOUR MOVE TODAY.
Go Blue and Bury OSU!
The Map
Okay, so for various quant-y reasons involving marginal rates of return and the like, it’s really helpful if y’all spread yourself across the map like an even. gooey layer of spiteful anti-Buckeye frosting.
Going to the website is the best way to execute this. But if you’re not, please, please go defend or attack something weird, far away, and unappealing like Colorado Springs, Morgantown, or Chihuahua. We want every corner of the map!
March 13th, 2023 at 12:16 PM ^
Of the 15 territories with B1G schools plus the Fig Things, we control 11 of them. Whilst decimating OSU, let's win those other 4 and do a clean sweep.
March 13th, 2023 at 12:20 PM ^
The orders said New Jersey. So I selected New Jersey. Go Blue!
March 13th, 2023 at 12:23 PM ^
Welcome to my area!
March 13th, 2023 at 12:26 PM ^
Sooo... did we win?
March 13th, 2023 at 12:34 PM ^
We'll let you know in about twelve hours.
March 13th, 2023 at 12:27 PM ^
Looking to extend my consecutive move MVP streak to three tonight.
Change your name from hipster to warlord stat
March 13th, 2023 at 12:38 PM ^
one last stomping
March 13th, 2023 at 12:50 PM ^
Muppets are standing by...
March 13th, 2023 at 12:47 PM ^
It would be nice to capture all of Michigan and all of ohio on the last day.
Aim for unattractive places. There will be plenty of rogues aiming for MI/OH.
Instructions unclear, Ohio is an unattractive place.
Aim for places colored red. Red is unattractive on this map.
Fair.
Aim for parts of the map that Ohio has invaded without local support.
Last day of the game, all of the pointless internet bragging rights come down to this. You eviscerated Texas A&M and stole their will to play, in classic Michigan fashion. Last step is to pound a few runs directly through Ohio State's defense and run up the score. The final score is set tonight, and you can be a part of the most extreme domination this game has seen in it's early days, also in classic Michigan fashion.
Put in your move and bask in the ever so faint glory of directly winning a competitive contest against the buckeyes.
Three cheers
attacking Mexico sometime tonight!
If you don't wish to use the orders website consider attacking Starkville, Tuscaloosa, or Tallahassee. This will help us possibly get the "Around The World" Achievement (Control every single territory at least once). Not the most important goal but it would be cool to get it.
Looks like we got them all.
Finally signed up for the first time, got my orders, and submitted. Let's finish this!
YES! Thank you Bill!
We have seen 1-stars win crucial territories SO many times. Your contribution is super valuable.
FWIW, I got <redacted>. So we'll see how that goes.
Also got my HS-age son signed up and his orders fulfilled. Go Blue!
Username checks out. Thanks for playing Bill Sr. and Bill Jr.! I’m amusing myself even if your son isn’t also your namesake.
Hah, he's not. I wasn't going to put another generation through that.
On a semi-related note, though, I updated my reddit account name (still linked to the same Google account) after I confirmed my move; now CFBRisk shows my old account name and clicking through shows the account's deleted? Just want to make sure I haven't utterly borked something.
Got my order and I'm defending <redeacted> territory from the evil Buckeyes. It's not much, but it's honest work.
I'm going to have nightmares about crosswalks, bicycles, motorcycles, traffic signals, stairs, bridges, hills, fire hydrants, vehicles, cars, and buses.
Seth should give some main page space for this. I would have to question any Michigan fan that frequents this board and does not play for just this one night. Fandome cards may be revoked and points lost.
We actually got some front page space today.
Nice. I just had the chance to catch up and saw it. Good stuff.
How do we know Ohio didn’t bring thier Bot army on the last day last year like they have at other times? How the game mgt protecting against this this time? Shouldn’t their be a trip wire against a sudden increase in team size on the last day like any increase of over 30%? Who on our team communicates regularly with the refs?
Game administrators indicate they have extra security precautions for the roll tonight. They did that early enough and publicly enough to discourage shenanigans. Sadly, the worst abuse this game rests at the feet of one of our (formerly) own.
March 13th, 2023 at 10:33 PM ^
Good job. Will there be muppets on the main page after this stirring victory?
March 13th, 2023 at 10:52 PM ^
Obviously.
congrats general. i couldn't help but think of this as the end result:
“For over a thousand years Roman conquerors returning from the wars enjoyed the honor of triumph, a tumultuous parade. In the procession came trumpeters, musicians and strange animals from conquered territories, together with carts laden with treasure and captured armaments. The conquerors rode in a triumphal chariot, the dazed buckeyes walking in chains before him. Sometimes his children robed in white stood with him in the chariot or rode the trace horses. A slave stood behind the conqueror holding a golden crown and whispering in his ear a warning: that all glory is fleeting.”