mushrooms and a trip from S. Quad to E. Quad and their monopoly themed decoration on upper floors.  It's still referred to as "Monopoly Land" amongst those in attendance. 

Better was a drunken visit to the Chi Phi house in the middle of the night as a HS senior to find a picture of my dad in one of their class photos.  I had a buddy in tow and I'm not sure why I felt the need but I did.  Credit to the guys who found the idiots wandering their house.  We found the photo and they sent us on our way.  It might have gone much worse.  I rushed my first semester as a student.  When I got to the Chi Phi house I was remembered by one of the dudes that found us that night. By the end of rush week I was no longer interested in being greek, but, again, credit to my dad's house.

A couple of the crazy but not the craziest things I did (there is no need to bring up everything) ....

We were having a party on our floor at Markley with a keg.  (2nd Elliot, if anyone cares.) This was the first year after they had outlawed kegs/alcohol in the dorms, BTW.  Campus security-soon to morph into Campus Police-showed up and started pounding on the door.  One of the guys was a walk-on linebacker on the football team and was already in some trouble because of an earlier incident.  He freaked out, picked the keg up, and tossed it through a thankfully open window.  It hit the loading dock 30 feet down and exploded, taking the screen with it.  We closed the window and opened the door.  Without evidence, nobody got in trouble.  Unless you count ruining all that beer as trouble.

Made Crime Notes five times. 

I was an architect working for an engineering firm in AA that designed Water and Wastewater treament plants. For Halloween I dressed up as a Toilet and during lunch hour I went around the office giving people "shit" (unwrapped baby ruth and snickers candy bars. I would say "now here is someone I want to give to some shit to...."

I was dressed in all white with a white hard hat, a toilet seat strapped to my waist with a weightlifting belt, a white laminated egg-crate box as a toilet tank with my arms stcking out the sides, a 1" pvc elbow as my flush handle, and a toilet roll dispenser strapped to my thigh, and I sat on a 12" high inverted white cyllinder planter.

After work I won a halloween costume contest at Bennigan's. I paraded around the bar telling toilet referenced jokes. "I'm the original Mt. T. I'm even self cleaning (as I wiped down my toilet seat). Would you believe I desgn wastewater treatment plants. I would stop and sit down on my planter base and spin around to show myself off in all directions. And of course I would hnd out my remaining unwrapped chocolate covered candy bars (shit) to all who dared except them.

I won the contest because I was a toilet with personality!

On halloween night I sat on my porch in my costume handing out candy to all the trick-or-treaters. The parents and kids loved it. Many pictures were taken by parents with their child seated on my toilet seat!

Years later kids in the neighborhood would still ask me if I was the Toilet who sat on my porch giving out candy.

I got into a fight with an ohio fan tailgating before The Game in '05. I'm 5'9" and a buck fifty. It did not go well for me. After getting my face ground into the pavement (literally), I attempted to enter the game but was denied entry since there was still blood gushing from the wound that occupied half of my forehead. After much pleading (you can't make me miss the ohio game in my senior year!), they let me in on the condition that I head straight to the medical tent. Obviously I bee-lined to the student section. Like Shane Morris, I was not going to miss the game because of a probable mild concussion.

NO ENTRY

This was something crazy/creepy that happened TO me:

I was working in the building kinda attached to the USB (I forget the name), near the power plant. I was my first time there and I got kinda lost looking for the bathroom. The hallways were dark except the light coming from the exit doors that lead to the bridge/walkway (which leads to the usb). As I'm walking by the doors, I see this tall woman dressed in a long black dress, wearing a black hat with dark feathers sticking out, complete with dark makeup. I found that creepy, so I kept walking and headed to the 2nd floor to look for the bathroom there.

So I'm walkin through these long dim hallways on the 2nd floor and I hear the click-clack of heels behind me. High heels. As I take a corner, I see a dark figure behind me.....with feathers sticking out of its head. Every corner I take, she inches closer. At this point I'm scared shitless. 

I finally find a men's bathroom and quickly rush in. I wait for a second in there and hear her heel click-clack past the door and fade away. Relieved, I empty my bladder in the fountain, thinking about how much of a bitch I was for being scared of a random goth lady. Smiling at myself and feeling a little embarrased, I turned around to see the goth lady staring right at me.

If I hadn't just taken a piss, I would've pissed my pants. Her back was facing me and she was looking at me through the bathroom mirror that was across the fountains. Scared the shit out of me! She then turns and leaves, and I'm just standing there in shock, happy to still be alive.

When I left the bathroom, she was talking to a custodian asking for directions. Apparently the theater school was having a drag show. It was a guy.

This story is a confession of sorts.  One night during my freshman year during the later 1970's, we came back to Mosher Jordan pretty wasted.   I decided for no particular reason that it would be fun to kick my dorm room door really hard.  I was joined by another guy and after a number of kicks decided to do something else stupid.  By some miracle, we didn't kick the door open but did manage to crack the door frame.  No one from the dorm noticed it when we checked out in late April, but sometime during the summer my roomate and I received letters from the dorm director basically saying we were responsible for the damage.  So, we concocted some story about not knowing anything about it, and that someone had said it had been done when we were gone one weekend visiting home, yada yada yada.  We ended up having to meet with the Director in Ann Arbor face-to-face who without any proof themselves, had to accept our made up story.  To this day, I'm ashamed of lying to them instead of just telling the truth, especially since I've been an impeccably honest person since then.    One motivation at the time was not telling my parents about it!  Anyway, it's good at least to get it off my chest. 

I've been racking my brain trying to figure out how to make the story sound crazy, but I think it was awesome.  Sadly, it doesn't really involve drinking or passing or any other fun circumstance.  It also probably can't ever be repeated, so that is cool.

Way back in the day, I was working for the athletic department doing maintenance and custodial stuff at Crisler and the Stadium.  I worked my way up the peon rungs and was given a master key (that unlocked everything) to make it easier for me to do my job and to get started in the morning/lock up at night.

Anyway, I arranged for my housemates and I to challenge a group of friends to a basketball game.  We went to Crisler at 11:00 one night, shut the curtains to the tunnel/concourse and turned on the lights.  We preceded to play first to 100 with breaks at every first to multiple of 25.  Couple of hours later, and my squad had lost by two due to a couple of missed layups by yours truly.  there is photographic evidence, that I won't share as to not incriminate the others.

... but I was wondering if anyone else ever got into the tunnels on campus?  A few of us were in the East Quad basement one day and noticed an unmarked door was unlocked.  We went in there and found a network of halls and rooms.  The rooms had kind of turned into storage areas and the halls were just rather dark and dusty.  We wondered around for a while and never found anything too interesting.  When we finally went out a door, we were across the street in the School of Ed. building.  Unfortunately we never found that door unlocked again and never got to explore any futher.  

took a dump in the shower and the custodian quit

edsel god bless his soul

there were a ton of other things going on that made my roomie think he needed to poop

We also stole a box of cocoa puffs from the cafeteria and then spread them all over the hallway

we then stomped on them

We went to a toga on my first weekend at school. To this day, I can't remember where it was; only that it was several houses on a court. I really didn't hold my liquor very well, and I was a sloppy mess. After trying to put some dazzling moves on some of my new fellow coeds, I stumbled away back to MoJo, but got completely lost. 

I ended up in Burns Park somehow, and I was dog tired. Fortunately, there was a motorhome in a driveway, and the door was unlocked, so I climbed in and passed out.

The next morning, I was awoken by a scream of a middle-aged woman. I stumbled out of the motorhome, still in toga, and ran from her and her husband. I was so afraid they'd call the police that I tried to make the toga look like a shirt, and I was still completely lost (cell phones were not very prevalent).

I made it home after asking for directions a few times. Fortunately, a hungover teen in a toga shirt was not such a strange sight...

Crawled under the fence by Crisler when they were doing construction a few years ago. Explored Michigan Stadium on Christmas Eve, after driving up for the holidays for 17 hours straight. Only time I've ever actually been in the stadium (until I go to my first game in a few weeks against Maryland). Couldn't get very far except for the staircases and the councourse, but it was all sorts of fun (and cold).

Could probably get in trouble for that but, eh.