Lane Kiffin Treachery
As we were informed by a true genius yesterday, offensive wunderkind Lane Kiffin’s recent appearance at a Michigan bowl practice proves he harbors secret thoughts of ascending to become the Wolverines’ head someday. Yet a South Carolina newspaper reported yesterday that Kiffin also visited Will Muschamp this week and took in the ‘Cocks!
This is very disturbing news that raises many difficult questions. Perhaps Kiffin considers Michigan long-term marriage potential, but wants to have his fun with South Carolina first? Perhaps Kiffin professed his love for the Michigan program on his visit with Harbaugh, only to be rebuffed—and Muschamp has, in the words of Sir Mix-a-Lot, “pulled up quick to retreive’em?” Or perhaps Kiffin is a sinister double-agent, spying on Michigan and passing along their secrets to the Gamecocks?
Notably, The State article points out that Kiffin will remain in Tampa the entire week leading up to the Outback Bowl. Could there be more Kiffin drama still to come? It’s something to watch for as the days tick down to the opening Gunn.
December 28th, 2017 at 9:44 AM ^
It might be fun for you to take a look at the board post "Well, alrighty then ... " wherein a person posted a highly-related topic. After getting boatloads of flak, he refashioned the OP to basically go full Eric Cartman.
Good times.
December 28th, 2017 at 9:53 AM ^
I figured someone's egg nog was spiked. I come into work this morning and I'm positive someone's egg nog and fruitcake was spiked.
December 28th, 2017 at 10:02 AM ^
I think he did read it, and it was the basis for his tongue-in-cheek OP. Witness the first sentence: "As we were informed by a true genius yesterday..."
December 28th, 2017 at 10:04 AM ^
Duly-noted.
December 28th, 2017 at 9:53 AM ^
December 29th, 2017 at 2:08 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 9:54 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 11:20 AM ^
Said no one ever (Except this guy who is clearly drunk)
December 28th, 2017 at 11:22 AM ^
Really? Drunk takes before 10 AM?
Maybe let Gunn's thread burn to the ground for no reason at all then.
In all seriousness though, no thanks.
December 28th, 2017 at 12:14 PM ^
December 29th, 2017 at 10:38 AM ^
Several people around here complained that Rich Rodriguez didn't fit the "Michigan culture." Do you think Kiffin would do better?
December 28th, 2017 at 9:54 AM ^
Fake news. Lane Kiffin was at the Michigan practice, but it was Joey Freshwater (he bears a similar resemblance to Lane) that was at the South Carolina practice.
December 28th, 2017 at 10:00 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 9:55 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 10:26 AM ^
After yesterday he likely is without points to neg anyone. Brutal.
December 28th, 2017 at 11:12 AM ^
But self inflicted.
Just walk away, son.
Don't turn a one day story into a two day story.
December 28th, 2017 at 9:57 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 10:01 AM ^
Was wondering the same thing. Maybe as a warning? Kind of like the head of William Wallace on London Bridge.
December 28th, 2017 at 10:52 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 10:02 AM ^
I was kind of surprised to still see it up, but some of the responses in that thread are pretty damn hilarious. Maybe the moms are seeing it as kind of a baby/bathwater situation at this point.
December 28th, 2017 at 10:00 AM ^
https://www.landof10.com/michigan/fau-coach-lane-kiffin-michigan-aspire-like-jim-harbaugh
I don't know if this was mentioned in the meltdown thread, but Kiffin/Harbaugh has happened before. Also, they coached in California at the same time.
December 28th, 2017 at 10:00 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 10:00 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 10:06 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 10:23 AM ^
Okay but how much less??
December 28th, 2017 at 10:58 AM ^
Irregardless, for all intensive purposes, your not being very nice.
December 28th, 2017 at 11:07 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 11:17 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 11:22 AM ^
..with all CAPS and lots of exclamation points!! Followed by a haha or lol.
December 28th, 2017 at 11:55 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 11:39 AM ^
Irregardless is the worst. Am I to regard or not?
December 28th, 2017 at 10:06 AM ^
Word out of South Carolina is, Kiffen loves the cocks
December 28th, 2017 at 10:07 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 10:09 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 10:09 AM ^
That final sentence though!
December 28th, 2017 at 10:11 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 10:16 AM ^
I have corrected the misspellings, professor. Thanks for pointing them out. Have a great vacation!
December 28th, 2017 at 12:24 PM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 10:15 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 10:37 AM ^
Perhaps Lane Kiffin's America, like Jim Harbaugh's America, allows people to travel and visit other places. Sometimes you don't even have to cross borders to do that.
December 28th, 2017 at 10:22 AM ^
As an open format kind of person, I have always been against a point total in order to post. But after yesterday, I am now in favor of one. I hope Gunn comes back. He got Michigan-Rutgers, circa 2016, yesterday. Always best to get right back up after that beatdown.
December 28th, 2017 at 10:37 AM ^
2. It resulted in an epic negging
3. I missed it aiiiieeeeeeeee
December 28th, 2017 at 10:38 AM ^
"took in the Cocks"
NTTAWT
December 28th, 2017 at 10:39 AM ^
December 28th, 2017 at 11:12 AM ^
Ha, yeah, I knew somebody was going to call me out for this. Here's my explanation.
There is a part of the song where Mix is talking about bruthas who don't appreciate a big ass:
"Some bruthas wanna play the hard role and tell ya that the butt ain't gold
So they toss it, and leave it--
And I pull up quick to retrieve it."
Well, that's basically the part of the song I was going for (i.e., the butt being a metaphor for Kiffin, Harbaugh playing the hard role and tossing him, Muschamp doing the retrieving). But since Kiffin is a person, using the pronoun "it" did not seem appropriate. So, I slightly altered the text into "pulled up quick to retrieve'em."
It just so happens there is another part of the rhyme where Mix "pulls up quick" to do something. Specifically, in that part he is talking about women with much back who are abused by their men, and then Mix "pull[s] up quick to get wit 'em." This type of situation certainly does not provide an apt metaphor for the Kiffin-at-bowl-practice scenario. Unfortunately, my use of "retrieve'em" creates an obvious danger of confusing the sharp Mix afficianado, and thinking I mistakenly inserted "retrieve" into the "get wit'em" line, rather than purposefully replacing "it" with "'em" in the "retrieve it" line. Mea culpa.
December 28th, 2017 at 11:43 AM ^