Tailgate Etiquette - Bringing Guests

Submitted by Harbaugh2Kolesar on September 23rd, 2022 at 5:08 PM

Last season, we were invited to my wife's coworker's husband's tailgate(that's a lot of apostrophes) for the osu game.  It's in the blue lot and they've done it for years.  Nice size spread and probably about 30 people there when we joined.  They told us we were welcome to stop by for any future games.

We are meeting up with another couple before the penn state game.  Is it in bad taste to bring them to that same tailgate?  We've never done much tailgating other than drinking by our own vehicle, so I don't really know the etiquette for some of the larger tailgates you see.  If I remember correctly, I believe there was a donation box on one of the food tables.  Does that mean that it's sort of open to anyone who wonders by?  Not that we would've done this, but I'm pretty sure we could've just grabbed some food and hung out there without knowing anyone.

Also, I'm sure we will just mention it to my wife's coworker and we'll get a 'the more the merrier...' answer. They are great people.  I just don't want to take advantage of anyone, especially since we are rookies.

Just wanted to hear the opinions of the seasoned vets here.

DTOW

September 23rd, 2022 at 5:14 PM ^

I don't see any issues.  Maybe whip some kind of food item up for the group and bring your own cooler.  Tailgates are supposed to be a social event.

Denard In Space

September 23rd, 2022 at 5:21 PM ^

Yeah even just bringing some drinks is a good faith gesture enough. Should be on solid ground unless there's some weird specificity to the tailgate (like it was a frat-only get together or something like that).  My ex's family used to have a large parking lot tailgate and it would be normal for randos to just swing by and make conversation and sample some of the fare, I never saw any tension.  

KRK

September 23rd, 2022 at 5:33 PM ^

If they got upset about then it's not the kind of tailgate you want to be at.  I went to a LSU game, randomly met and chatted up a guy while waiting to cross the street, and he invited us to his boss's tailgate where his boss proceeded to treat us like his long lost brothers.  They may be on the far end of the hospitality spectrum, but it should be a level we all strive for.

Angry-Dad

September 23rd, 2022 at 6:22 PM ^

Having been to tailgates in the South and the Midwest I will say southern Tailgaiters are much more welcoming.  Not that big ten country is not, but they expect you to bring something ex. food/drinks.  My experience in the south is you bring cash and they are more than welcoming, the vast majority refusing the money.  Just different atmospheres.  When I was in town for the Hawaii game it really took some time for Michigan fans to warm up.  Eventually it was fine but it was far from an open arms type situation.  

Venom7541

September 23rd, 2022 at 5:36 PM ^

I've never been much into tailgating, but in my experience at games, I get invited to tailgates all the time while going back and forth from buying stuff and putting it into the car. Everyone has seemed to be exceptionally friendly, but I never tested walking up to a tailgate without the invite either.

MGoLow

September 23rd, 2022 at 5:51 PM ^

Echoing previous sentiments: personally I would contribute a beverage or a few bucks if I was going to bring someone, but it's probably not necessary. Also, if the people you're bringing are a good time, you're already contributing to the atmosphere. 

samsoccer7

September 23rd, 2022 at 5:55 PM ^

A guy behind me in the MDen line chatted us up and invited us to his tailgate at the golf course. We didn’t go but the point is everyone is in a good mood and the hosts won’t care as long as you’re respectful (bring beer, food, donation, etc.).

CRISPed in the DIAG

September 23rd, 2022 at 6:03 PM ^

I've never seen a donation box at a tailgate but I'm not classy enough for a blue lot. Usually, tailgates have more food than they can eat, so I wouldn't feel too much shame if you're not bringing anything but your appetite.  Bringing guests isn't a problem at all: I'm always glad to meet new people on these occasions and I've never felt unwelcome. Be sure to introduce your guests to the host and make some small talk.

That said, it is failsafe social move to bring a bag of chips and some dips. Maybe a jug of cider and some donuts. Something lighter - especially if the host has a meat grill going.

MJ14

September 23rd, 2022 at 6:18 PM ^

This is a timely thread, because I was about to jump on here and try to get someone to let my wife, 2 brothers, and I join their tailgate! If anyone is up for having us join you, let me know! We’re happy to bring some food and beer along with us. We usually don’t tailgate but my wife has decided on a Friday that she wants to tailgate and I said I’d try to find someone to let us jump in. 

Perkis-Size Me

September 23rd, 2022 at 6:59 PM ^

I don’t think it’s a big deal at all, but if you partake in any of the food/beverage at the tailgate, offer to pitch in a couple bucks for it. You could also bring a bag of Tostitos, a 12 pack of Bud Light or some CostCo Cookies and you’ll be right as rain.

1974

September 23rd, 2022 at 7:00 PM ^

Combining two suggestions seen in volume here:

  • Run this by your wife's co-worker.
  • In passing, ask what they could most use. (Might be Tabasco sauce. They might already have twenty packages of cookies.)

Darker Blue

September 23rd, 2022 at 7:19 PM ^

Bring an ounce of mushrooms 

And a freshly baked batch of pot cookies. 

Do drugs

Say fuck the tailgate and flyyyyyy

In all seriousness though I'd simply ask if it's okay.

RedRum

September 24th, 2022 at 12:10 AM ^

Don’t smell their crotch until they have sniffed your crotch. Common courtesy. Always comment that their Gorgonzola scent is like spring tulips and makes you desire a good Cabernet. Then immediately start talking religion, politics and providing parenting advice where applicable. If the host doesn’t have kids, give them hell for not expanding the species. If he or she does have children, comment on our planets overcrowding problems. Try to infer most of our problems are probably related to activities your host is currently engaged. For example, cooking hot dogs: cancer. Serving salad: pesticides. Relaxing: being lazy. Working: not enjoying life. When they ask you to leave, comment on their intolerance, then beg to stay, cry a bit, and ask a random person there for his/her number. 

mgoblue78

September 23rd, 2022 at 7:19 PM ^

My mentor, who was a legendary pregame cocktail party host (he held them at his home, not at a tailgate) had a simple rule: "Guests can bring guests. Guests of guests cannot bring guests." Seems like a good rule here.

TESOE

September 23rd, 2022 at 8:15 PM ^

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chambord_%28liqueur%29?wprov=sfla1

Also bring a good joke, Chambord recipes and a hot take.

You were told to comeback. Listen to words when your gut is not talking.

Also good conversation starter...

Anisette https://g.co/kgs/Qq1rFH

These will mix with anything even if you don't.

Kingpin74

September 23rd, 2022 at 9:05 PM ^

Speaking from personal experience, I’m thrilled if anyone remotely friendly comes over to the tailgate because I overbuy out of caution and that means less beer and supplies that I have to re-load into the fridge/pantry at home that night. No need to bring anything either, although it’s a nice gesture. I feel like it’s sort of the social contract to welcome fellow fans within reason when you host a tailgate. Go Blue!

urbanachiever

September 23rd, 2022 at 10:26 PM ^

I don't think anyone would have a problem with bringing 2 guests to a ~30 person tailgate. My family hosted tailgates (usually 10 to 30 people, it varied week to week) for years and guests were a common occurrence

TheBlueAbides

September 23rd, 2022 at 11:02 PM ^

Bring your own drinks, walk over, feel the vibe. I have never been turned away from a tailgate, but have at times been left out of food/drinks/shot offerings. It isn’t their responsibility to provide so it just depends, but show up with a few drinks of choice and 99% chance they are willing to share their space, if not more. Enjoy! Go blue!

M Go Cue

September 24th, 2022 at 12:12 AM ^

I really love the Midwest.  One side worried about being a burden and the other side is probably worried that not enough people will feel welcomed.

Just bring some Ambrosia and you’ll be all set. 😊 

East Quad

September 24th, 2022 at 5:53 AM ^

I've never tailgated. I've never wondered about wandering by, either. I am an OG and I did sleep at a Holiday Inn Express last night, though, so I am an expert.

How about giving the host a phone call and asking?