An Eleven Warriors Modest Proposal
Yes, the author makes a nod to Jonathan Swift. Still...
I shall now therefore humbly propose my own thoughts, which I hope will not be liable to the least objection. I have been assured by a very knowing college football fan of my acquaintance, that a former football power well outfitted is a most a most attractive candidate for a second-tier conference trying to increase their stature in the FBS world. I propose, therefore, that the Big Ten should drop the University of Michigan from the ranks of conference teams and facilitate its entry to one of the lesser conferences for the good of all involved.
I have reckoned upon a medium that a team of such formerly high stature, if given an annual slate of conference foes such as that offered by someone like the Mountain West or the WAC, would prosper greatly in both the number and the margin of victories. At the same time, the conference that acquires this former power will prosper by including U of M in their ranks in both the athletic and academic realms. Meanwhile, the Big Ten prospers by adding higher quality programs that are not currenly engulfed in scandals and beset by numerous transfers.
This to me appears to be a win-win situation. So, 11W readers, what thinkest thou of my proposal?
So MGoBlogerati: what dost thou think of his proposal?
[Edit: I thought I didn't need to do this. I guess I was wrong. A Modest Proposal For Preventing the Children of Poor People in Ireland from Being a Burden to Their Parents or Country, and for Making Them Beneficial to the Public]
We could go to the Sun Belt, win every game, and whine for inclusion in the BCSCG because we "did everything we could."
I'm relieved we have OSU alums like these out there. The world needs ditch diggers.
This clearly a sarcastic joke.
No human being in their right mind would think it wise to vote out one of the most recognizeable and valuable brands in college sports, regardless of performance. One of the largest alumni bases in the country would not find that a wise decision and it would likely result in a tremendous hit to the economic gain of the conference as a whole.
Thus, I will chalk this up to another idiotic idea stemming from that school down south.
Note to self: Don't respond seriously to a joke.
Duly noted.
Nothing to see here...
Move along...
Never mind, read the edit.
Allow me to be the first to wipe my ass upon your proposal.
stop there? We should go FCS and get pay back on Appy St year in and year out! I bet our offense that can't handle it in the B10, would own the FCS.
RABBLERABBLERABBLE
Its just a joke piece. Its the offseason.
I confused "modest" with "lucid" and "cogent" in the 11W proposal. It was possibly the former, but certainly not either of the latter adjectives.
Denard Robinson = Ohio State Kryptonite
I'm not exactly sure that some of you are familiar with the original work that's being parodied. For those uninitiated in classical literature: it recommended eating babies.
...See my edit above for the reference if you aren't familiar.
Can't believe I didn't make the connection to A Modest Proposal. It's been a while though.
it was tough for 18th century readers to decipher what Swift was doing because he refused to use "[Note Satire]" at the end of his works.
A Modest Proposal is, after all, one of the most famous satires of all time. I was just so shocked that someone writing for an OSU sports blog would know it, I completely missed the reference.
Or maybe this is the proof to the theory that if you give enough monkeys a paint brush, they'll recreate the Sistene Chapel ceiling, (in other words, 11W got it by random chance).
Did not know that.
Edit: Now that I know that exists, I must read it. Can't believe I've never heard of such a thing.
I learned something today. Thank you MGoBlog.
Oh, and that is some sick shit! Like Monty Python X Pantera...
Whichever team finishes last gets dropped to the MAC for a year. Then we could be a conference that could count
One thing I can guarantee you: While a few people reading this thread may not have gotten the Swift reference, not a single person reading that post on 11 Warriors did!!
..."Selected Literary References for Engineers and Everyone Who Slept Through English Literature in High School" if anyone is interested.
No? Alrighty, then.
At least they're kidding. I think BSD could read that post and take it on its merits.
BSD would likely just nod and say "See, we told you so."
And applies it to Michigan. Clap (Waddums style). Do something that concerns thyself and I shall be impressed, or else I will standby stolid and return to shit that matters.
im an engineer. maybe i'll get the next one
and an OSU fan named Lenny.
IIRC, he was just a slow-witted guy who was unaware of his limitations, especially when compared to his nearest companion.
the MGoReadingList...
people here talking shit about OSU as an academic instituation when half of the posters couldn't recognize a super obvious parody of the most famous satire ever written... sigh.
What temporal anomaly allows these guys to produce a biting, well timed satire?
What ever happened to poop jokes, simple hate-mongering and misspelled state slogans?