Preview 2014: Wrap, Hype, Hope
Hello. You have made it to the end. This year's edition checks in at 43,424 words.
THE STORY
Memories Of Butter. Let's punch a cow until it gives us butter, because it's hard to remember the right way to do it.
OFFENSE
Quarterback. Protect this man for great profit.
Running back. Emerge from the swamp and claim your birthright.
Wide Receiver. I will not compare Devin Funchess to Megatron… okay maybe just a little.
Tight End And Friends. Waiting for Budot.
Offensive Line. The catch.
5Q5A, Offense. The madness of last year and leaving it behind.
DEFENSE
Defensive End. Secret Agent Clark is the key to the whole thing.
Defensive Tackle. We have the meat. We have the ogre. Unleash the meatogre.
Linebacker. Four starters for two and a half spots. I like 'em both.
Cornerback. In ur face jammin ur doodz
Safety. In this solitary case, Nickelback does not suck.
5Q5A, Defense. Making the case that this is the year to kick ass.
MISCELLANEOUS
Special Teams. Hagerup leg cannon returns.
Podcast 6.0. We may still be recording this, it's that long.
Heuristics and Stupid Prediction. I say 9-3.
THE HORROR II
Previewed by Ace.
ELSEWHERE
MGoVideo on the Salvadorean marching band that saved the 1998 Rose Bowl.
One of my favorite annual pieces is always Orson's season kickoff post. He outdid himself this year. I had the fortune to read it in my feed reader, which meant the GIFs embedded in the post just ran; on SBN their normally very wise GIF-handling software only runs them when you mouseover the image. This is unfortunate, as the gifs give the piece a wonderfully haunted air.
I wasn't really prepared for the last one.
Oof.
I know I've been pissed off you guys about the increasingly aggressive moneychangers in the temple, but goddamn that is heartstopping. I want to go there again. I want to see the mountains in the background as the sun sets in the third quarter and feel that awe and privilege that this place exists and I have a reason to be here.
And now I feel like there is still something sacred out there, and that is why we all gravitated to this thing in the first place. The bowl goes up and up and it is just impossibly full of people. The thing in front of us is happening right now and I will remember this as glory or death until I've forgotten my own name. The thing is still in there. You just have to look a little harder these days. Rummage around. You'll find it.
Go Blue.
[Eric Upchurch]
August 29th, 2014 at 4:40 PM ^
Beveled Guilt
August 29th, 2014 at 4:43 PM ^
we're in for a great ride this season. Well-done and thanks to Brian & Co.
Now, Go Damn Blue!
August 29th, 2014 at 4:45 PM ^
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August 29th, 2014 at 4:46 PM ^
Brian, near the top of the many reasons I am happy that I'm a Michigan fan is that no matter how many disappointing seasons we have, we always get to have this blog. Truly, there is no other place like this one, and it makes fandom significantly more fun. Thank you.
August 29th, 2014 at 9:51 PM ^
August 29th, 2014 at 4:47 PM ^
Every year, I'm brought to literal tears by the wrap-up of the preview; not, like, gushing-down-my-face tears, but, "my eyes feel full, man" tears. I don't know what it is, maybe it's the mad-dash season preview followed by Brian's amazing ability to pack so much punch into a two paragraph conclusion. I don't know. Whatever it is, despite telling myself not to every year, I am inevitably, woefully overinvested in the one damn thing in my life that I have no control over.
Let's Go Blue.
August 29th, 2014 at 4:55 PM ^
There's a lot in your life you have no control over :-)
Otherwise, couldn't agree more! Let's get it started!!
August 29th, 2014 at 4:59 PM ^
Yes, that's really true. I guess I meant that it's the one thing in life that I have control in having no control over...if that makes any sense at all! : )
August 29th, 2014 at 6:34 PM ^
There is no control. Only presence. :)
In it's finest form pure love.
That is what we all feel tonight.
GOOOOOOOOOOOOO......
August 29th, 2014 at 7:19 PM ^
you choose to have no control over the outcomes and therefore your emotions. Control in having no control. No?
August 29th, 2014 at 9:39 PM ^
...BLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUE!!!!!!
August 29th, 2014 at 4:54 PM ^
I'm ready to run through a wall and I've never played football. There will be a couple times this year I can make it to a game and I can't wait to walk through the aisle, and see that bowl that Brian so eloquently described, it takes my breath away each time.
College football is the best. That thing is still there.
Go Blue.
August 29th, 2014 at 4:55 PM ^
"The thing is still in there. You just have to look a little harder these days. Rummage around. You'll find it."
Hit me right in my stomach man. Started welling up.
GO BLUE!
August 29th, 2014 at 4:56 PM ^
Teary-eyed, don't care.
August 29th, 2014 at 4:56 PM ^
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August 29th, 2014 at 4:57 PM ^
As always, Brian, thank you for the outstanding work that you do. Go Blue.
August 29th, 2014 at 4:57 PM ^
Now turn these ANGRY wolverines loose!!!
August 29th, 2014 at 5:07 PM ^
Sometimes when you're on, Brian...
August 29th, 2014 at 5:49 PM ^
He's really fucking on.
August 29th, 2014 at 5:08 PM ^
August 29th, 2014 at 5:13 PM ^
I end every wrap post with it.
August 29th, 2014 at 5:17 PM ^
August 29th, 2014 at 7:21 PM ^
There's still some time left... plz bring back the Hoke banner. We won 11 games with that banner!
BTW-Thanks for all the work you do and I enjoy listening to you on WTKA.
August 29th, 2014 at 5:35 PM ^
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August 29th, 2014 at 5:49 PM ^
take a bow.
August 29th, 2014 at 5:59 PM ^
excellent stuff all week. Very much appreciated. Now do us all a favor and relax and enjoy the game Saturday
August 29th, 2014 at 6:02 PM ^
August 29th, 2014 at 6:09 PM ^
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August 29th, 2014 at 6:16 PM ^
sounds like deep down brian still has a little feelingsball left, in the most basic sense of the word. we care about sports. a lot. bravo on the excellent 2014 preview and thanks to the whole mgoteam!
August 29th, 2014 at 6:18 PM ^
Great gif. Agreed.
/Brian Carpal Tunnel Syndrome Appreciation Thread
August 29th, 2014 at 6:26 PM ^
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August 29th, 2014 at 6:30 PM ^
August 29th, 2014 at 6:35 PM ^
Thanks so much, Brian. You're a rockstar.
August 29th, 2014 at 6:39 PM ^
thank you for all this, it is wonderful.
August 29th, 2014 at 6:40 PM ^
I'm watching the game with my dad. No amount of commercialism can besmirch that.
August 30th, 2014 at 1:44 AM ^
tl;dr: college football is great, enjoy watching the game with your dad!
August 30th, 2014 at 2:26 AM ^
I don't comment alot but thanks for your comment. I have a 11 year old son and I can't wait to watch the game with him.
August 29th, 2014 at 6:40 PM ^
Seriously fucking sick writing (and sports blogging of course). Bravo!
August 29th, 2014 at 6:42 PM ^
"Elsewhere" = why I've been reading this blog more closely than just about anything else for the last seven bizarre-assed years. So, so good.
August 29th, 2014 at 6:45 PM ^
August 29th, 2014 at 6:52 PM ^
The job you and the others do on this site is irreplaceable. No one else in the blogosphere is even close. No matter what happens this year, never get down about how this site is run. Yes, there have been many faction battles over the years, but it is a sad day when I don't check mgoblog half a dozen times for new content, often sadly refreshing until the early morning hours, waiting for new articles the next day.
Bravo.
August 29th, 2014 at 7:05 PM ^
Thank God. I was beginning to wonder if you had really, truly come to dispise the whole damn thing. Nothing is perfect, and the NCAA is so very less perfect than most. But fuck it. Tomorrow is football, tomorrow we go home.
August 29th, 2014 at 7:14 PM ^
Lets. Fucking. GO!
August 29th, 2014 at 8:00 PM ^
August 29th, 2014 at 8:25 PM ^
I'm just going to start referring to Funchess as Optimus Prime.
August 29th, 2014 at 8:43 PM ^
Cool videos, but there sure are a lot of games in them that we should have won. Oh well. 2014.
August 29th, 2014 at 8:53 PM ^
Kudos to Brian and the gang, keeping us all pumped as the clock ticks down to kickoff.
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