EVENT REMINDER:

FOOTBALL EVE 2018, hosted by Matt Demorest of HomeSure Lending, will be at 6:00 PM on Thursday, August 30, at 327 E. Hoover, Ann Arbor—the same place as last year. There will be Scratch BBQ and Catering. There will be beer. There will be "OMIGOD COLLEGE FOOTBALL" on TV.

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Don't look too closely at the video or the new weights or you'll realize you're being a little bit lied to. Doesn't matter, we've got PHONEBOOKS so let's OVERANALYZE them as is TRADITION around these PARTS! Steve?

Can I help?

Yes.

Chart?

Yes.

WEIGHT GAIN 2000 AND 18 THOUSAND!

We had something new this spring: an incoming freshman roster. That seemed to be coming from the players themselves since they didn't match any of the services. Anyway we have that to compare with the new bodies. The rules:

1. All weight gain is muscle
2. All weight lost was excess fat
3. No change means the player replaced excess fat with more muscle.

QUARTERBACK
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Shea Patterson			200	203	205			+3	+2
Brandon Peters			216	220	230			+4	+10
Dylan McCaffrey				199	217				+18
Joe Milton				220	234				+14
RUNNING BACK
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Karan Higdon		190	189	190	202		-1	+1	+12
Chris Evans			200	206	216			+6	+10
Tru Wilson			190	200	202			+10	+2
O'Maury Samuels				192	205				+13
Kurt Taylor				194	195				+1
Christian Turner				185	200				+15
Hassan Haskins				207	212				+5
Michael Barrett				215	224				+9
FULLBACK
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Jared Wangler	219	230	229	240	240	+11	-1	+11	-
Ben Mason				251	254				+3
Ben VanSumeren				232	236				+4
SLOT RECEIVER
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Grant Perry		185	196	191	195		+11	-5	+4
Eddie McDoom			180	181	187			+1	+6
Nate Schoenle			185	192	202			+7	+10
Oliver Martin				198	200				+2
WIDE RECEIVER
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Donovan Peoples-Jones				199	208				+9
Tarik Black				206	215				+9
Nico Collins				206	218				+12
Ronnie Bell				174	182				+8
TIGHT END
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Zach Gentry		230	244	248	262		+14	+4	+14
Nick Eubanks			236	240	252			+4	+12
Sean McKeon			240	248	251			+8	+3
Ryan Hayes				262	271				+9
Luke Schoonmaker				229	231				+2
Mustapha Muhammad				244	245				+1
OFFENSIVE TACKLE
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Juwann Bushell-Beatty	319	319	311	315	318	-	-8	+4	+3
Grant Newsome		280	318	314	318		+38	-4	+4
Nolan Ulizio		293	291	295	305		-2	+4	+10
Jon Runyan Jr.		275	304	298	310		+29	-6	+12
James Hudson				302	301				-1
Andrew Stueber				314	323				+9
Jalen Mayfield				275	296				+21
INTERIOR OFFENSIVE LINE
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Stephen Spanellis			335	307	300			-28	-7
Ben Bredeson			310	308	320			-2	+12
Michael Onwenu			350	350	350			-	-
Andrew Vastardis			305	311	317			+6	+6
Cesar Ruiz				316	319				+3
Joel Honigford				275	295				+20
Chuck Filiaga				345	341				-4
Phillip Paea				275	296				+21
DEFENSIVE TACKLE
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Bryan Mone	312	325	310	325	335	+13	-15	+15	+10
Lawrence Marshall	241	238	268	285	285	-3	+30	+17	-
Michael Dwumfour			300	290	285			-10	-5
Aubrey Solomon				297	287				-10
Deron Irving-Bey				274	294				+20
Donovan Jeter				288	308				+20
DEFENSIVE END
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Chase Winovich	220	230	245	253	255	+10	+18	+8	+2
Reuben Jones		225	222	245	250		+3	+23	+5
Rashan Gary			287	281	283			-6	+2
Ron Johnson			245	264	267			+19	+3
Carlo Kemp			255	264	280			+9	+16
Luiji Vilain				242	255				+13
Kwity Paye				241	260				+19
Taylor Upshaw				240	246				+6
Aidan Hutchinson				258	268				+10
Julius Welschof				253	253				-
LINEBACKER
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Noah Furbush	210	217	238	240	237	+7	+21	+2	-3
Josh Uche			217	226	238			+9	+12
Devin Bush			232	222	233			-10	+11
Devin Gil			230	220	231			-10	+11
Jordan Anthony				236	245				+9
Drew Singleton				219	222				+3
Josh Ross				229	225				-4
Cameron McGrone				225	228				+3
VIPER(!)
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Khaleke Hudson			205	205	220			-	+15
Jordan Glasgow		200	210	210	223		+10	-	+13
SAFETY
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Tyree Kinnel		200	206	201	215		+6	-5	+14
Josh Metellus			204	199	204			-5	+5
Brad Hawkins				204	213				+9
J'Marick Woods				203	210				+7
Jaylen Kelly-Powell				173	184				+11
Casey Hughes				185	187				+2
Sammy Faustin				190	187				-3
CORNERBACK
Player	2014	2015	2016	2017+	2018	14 to 15	15 to 16	16 to 17	17 to Now
Brandon Watson	188	189	203	200	204	+1	+14	-3	+4
David Long			187	187	198			-	+11
Lavert Hill			168	177	181			+9	+4
Ambry Thomas				179	183				+4
Benjamin St-Juste				193	196				+3
Myles Sims				173	183				+10
Vincent Gray				180	184				+4
Gemon Green				175	174				-1
German Green				178	175				-3

Hit THE JUMP fo…

Dude, I have like two jobs here.

Okay you do it.

[Hit THE JUMP if for some excessively optimistic obsessiveness]

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Let's talk about the weights, by position:

Quarterback.

Dylan McCaffrey ain't as gangly anymore and Brandon Peters is up to playing weight but the eye-opener here is Joe Milton at 234 pounds. That's not Cardale Jones (249 lbs on the Chargers) size but it's on the way there.

Running back.

You all saw the jacked photo of Higdon to make his 12 new pounds the most believable on the roster. Somehow Chris Evans is pacing ahead still, up to 216. O'Maury Samuels is over 200, and Michael Barrett, if he sticks at RB, is immediately the largest running back on the roster.

Receiver.

Big gains for last year's crop (except Oliver Martin) give Michigan three Big Ten-sized receivers where last year they had none. Tarik Black's 9 pounds are the most encouraging because he probably lost a lot of weight while holed up last year, and he was pretty spindly last year.

Tight end.

Zach Gentry is huuuuge. Eubanks is also well into blocky-catchy size now and if that comes with the associated blocking uptick he might ameliorate the loss of Wheatley. Also Ryan Hayes is listed as a tight end but he's up to 271 already—hoping for four games and a redshirt but it'll be fun to see those four games.

Offensive line.

Huge gains for freshmen becoming redshirt freshmen are normal but these are some big jumps. Joel Honigford is up 20 pounds, Andrew Stueber—despite reports he was up to 340—was listed at 323. Bredeson and Runyan gained 12 pounds each heading into their junior seasons. Also Jaylen Mayfield, who was supposed to be a TE type to hang weight on, is already listed at plausible left tackle playing weight. Filiaga being down 4 is probably a good sign but it's unknown how much of that was shift. Onwenu continues to be a silly guess because you can't weigh an object if the scale is just gravitationally sucked into it.*

Note: Paea has been working with the offensive line but he's still a DL to the rosters. He's also up to 296.

Defensive line.

Again the second-year players all got thicc. Paea, DIB and Jeter are all up near or past (in Jeter's case) 300 pouinds after 20+ gains. Kwity Paye's jump to 260 was something we heard about in spring, but Luigi Vilain's leap is probably more encouraging because his injury was still holding him back last spring. Carlo Kemp also put some proof to his spring hype by coming in at about the same size as Gary. Aubrey Solomon losing 10 pounds is not discouraging but I don't remember him carrying much bad weight. Mone at 335 is terrifying but also corroborates the spring chatter that he's topping out as more immovable object than unstoppable force.

Linebacker and Viper(!).

Uche as the second-heaviest linebacker on the roster  is something I didn't think I'd be seeing and probably good for him. Gil's 11 pounds are a great sign since his issue was size; Devin Bush's 11 pounds are probably something to keep the NFL from getting squirrely about a 220-pound doom squirrel. Surprised to see Singleton and Ross didn't gain that much but Brown likes them small.

Both Vipers are a lot bigger, about the size now that Bush was last year. Khaleke put proof to that in photos; Glasgow moved to Viper from strong safety and if he was able to play with that much more weight it's a good thing he did.

Safety.

All eyes are on JKP's tiny waist, which grew a few sizes but is still just 184—that was always a 2019 growth chart and he's on pace. Tyree Kinnel is the third guy lighting up Instagram with glistening new biceps at the beginning of fall and that's showing.

Cornerback.

David Long lost last season's chance to grow from his 2016 injury and he caught up—198 should be about his perfect size. Myles Sims is up to 183 which tracks with our belief he'll be the most likely freshman to be a true sophomore by this time next year.

Special teams.

I didn't put it on the chart but punter Brad Robbins is the biggest gainer on the team, up to 206 from 181. All 25 pounds are in his leg of course.

* You can take a snapshot of the event horizon but that won't be its current weight just the weight it shows when time stops.

This sounds like a lot of meat for the meat god.

Wanna hear about some walk-ons?

Just plausibly left-tackle shaped things please.

Freshman OL Griffin Korican is 6-6/305. Greg Robinson (NNTGERG) is down 8 pounds and to 6-6/280 so that's probably not happening. Dan Jokisch is up 28 pounds.

Is he 6-6?

He's 6-4 and that puts him at 279.

279 is like Michigan State tackle-sized.

Jess Speight is now 6-4/302. Presumably none of that is chicken fat.

Don't you have a 6-8 tight end you can put protein shakes into?

Carter Selzer is 6-8 and gained 12 pounds. He's a RS sophomore.

I'm listening.

He's now 234.

Height(!) Changes

These guys are all an inch taller than they were last year: Zach Gentry is now listed at 6-8. Deron Irving-Bey is 6-5. Devin Gil is 6-2. Ronnie Bell is 6-1. Casey Hughes the Utah transfer is 6-0 despite being 5-11 and 22 years old. Jon Runyan is 6-5.

6-5, that's big enough to play tackle!

You know people don't actually grow…

His dad is 6-10 or something it's happening

Number Changes

Tru Wilson is now 24 instead of "let's screw with Carl Grapentine" 27. Jacob West is #15 and a quarterback. Josh Uche is now #6 instead of #35! That's huge.

Huge! … Why is this huge?

Victor Hobson, David Bowens, Prescott Burgess, Paul Goebel as a junior in 1920…

Oh so roster overanalysis isn't just a once a year thing.

Not on the Roster:

Ran out of eligibility: Mason Cole, Mo Hurst, Mike McCray, Garrett Moores, Mo Hurst

You said Mo Hurst twice.

That second one was a reflexive sigh.

Oh. Transferred (you knew this) or left the program: Drake Harris (WMU), Ian Bunting, Elysee Mbem-Bosse, Kekoa Crawford, Kareem Walker, Alex Malzone, Ja'Raymond Hall, Ty Wheatley Jr., Mo Ways, Wilton Speight.

Walk-ons not returned: Alex Kaminski, Austin Brenner, Brian Chu, Joe Beneducci, Nick Volk, Cheyenn Robertson, Ryan Tice, Conner Edmonds, Eric Tim, Evan Latham, Sean Fitzgerald, James "Doug" Foug.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…..

They changed the rule.

….OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

They changed the rule! No more Foug'ing; no more Foug.

Any new walk-ons other than Korican catch your eye?

Jeff George Jr. and Berkeley Edwards both grad transferred in. There's a Kyle Grady.

As in Kelvin and Kevin?

No.

Freshman Numbers

 

Player	Pos	#	Deep Significance
Joe Milton	QB	5	Wangler! Also Tate.
Michael Barrett	ATH	6	Softens the blow of losing both Kareem and Wheatley Jr at the same time.
Christian Turner	RB	28	Fitz Toussaint shout-out
Hassan Haskins	RB	25	Good RB number. Harlan Hukleby, Jon Vaughn, Rob Lytle for a year
Ben VanSumeren	FB	20	Big Hart?
Ronnie Bell	WR	8	Haven't had a good Avant YMRMFSPA lately.
Ryan Hayes	TE	60	You sure you're a tight end?
Luke Schoonmaker	TE	89	Ian Bunting did not leave because I kept yelling "Pitch it to Breaston" at him where did you hear that?
Mustapha Muhammad	TE	85	Obviously went Kogering.
Jalen Mayfield	OL	73	Dufektion.
Aidan Hutchinson	DL	97	Hi dad.
Julius Welschof	DL	96	The Sechsundneunzigiest zahl.
Taylor Upshaw	SDE	91	Honoring Tom Seabron
Cameron McGrone	LB	44	Swett!
Myles Sims	CB	6	Like two Marlin Jacksons
Casey Hughes	DB	35	Don Dufek, Tom Darden
Gemon Green	DB	9	Marlin Jackson times three!
German Green	DB	13	Marlin Jackson plus ten!
Vincent Gray	DB	31	Marlin Jackson AND Braylon Edwards
Sammy Faustin	DB	17	Dwight and Ivan Hicks, Otis Williams...guy knows his safeties
Jake Moody	K	13	Why not 3?

Errata

Jared Wangler has moved to fullback. How's that transition going?

Evidently he's embracing it.

What does it all mean?

We're gonna be awesome!