aj henning punt return yes or no

During the break on last week's WTKA show a listener asked if Cole Cabana should return kicks and Sam was like "Sure" and the rest of us were like "NO!" in unison. Then we all talked over each other to explain why that's AJ Henning's job, because he's good at it and needs something to do since he's not getting passes. And then we all frowned because Sam just kept making that face.

Sometimes Sam knows something he's not telling us.

[Talking about it, after THE JUMP]

9/17/2022 – Michigan 59, UConn 0 – 3-0

After the opener someone complained in the comments that this bit above the fold was a utilitarian bit of text that didn't tell anyone how to feel. This is a completely fair criticism and also the work of an utter lunatic. It puts the emotional prose on the internet or it gets the hose again, sort of thing.

I don't know what emotion to communicate here in the aftermath of a third straight beatdown of Baby Seal U. It was generally pleasant to be out and about in the stadium on a not-too-hot day, watching helpless oompa-loompas grasp fruitlessly at our valiant warrior-poets. All conclusions, thoughts, feelings, and idle thoughts are polluted by the quality of opposition, with a few limited exceptions. It was… fine. Any attempt at a grand conclusion is a stretch.

But, lo: it is demanded. So I will stretch.

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If there's anything to take from this game going forward it's that we might be on the verge of Denard, But Also Brady. Michigan dumped more wide receiver screens on UConn than they did for the entirety of the Josh Gattis "speed in space" era if you ignore that one Penn State game, and one in particular jumped out. It this one from just before the half:

I have to assume this is a bust since there's no reaction from the boundary corner when Bell goes in motion and then the LB to the field just tears at the QB. But!

I've seen this mania before. That is eight guys in the box or environs, two guys worried about the quarterback, and acres of open space where the ball is actually going. We saw it when Denard Robinson was at full power.

Denard-esque quarterbacks had a moment induced by the introduction of the zone read in college football but have receded to the background as defenses adjusted. These days you need to have both halves if you're going to make it work, and if you have to sacrifice one it's the legs. Very few quarterbacks have enough of both to see real defenses set themselves on fire like this. One of them happens to play for the Baltimore Ravens, where Matt Weiss came from. Another one hung out with Jim Harbaugh at Stanford.

I am heartened to see the easy yards taken, and the easy yards become easier because the opposition is overreacting to something else you put on tape. Michigan is iterating, and it puts something else to deal with on the opposition's platter weekly. I already pushed all my chips in last week about JJ McCarthy being another level of quarterback than any we've seen under Jim Harbaugh. This week I am pushing a smaller stack in on a different table about Michigan's ability to take advantage of the surfeit of weapons they've assembled. We approached a 50/50 split between run and pass on first down in this game, and as we go along here confidence in McCarthy should only grow.

Now, onto opponents who are at least flopping around as you try to whack them between the eyes.

AWARDS

Known Friends and Trusted Agents Of The Week

guess who's back [Patrick Barron]

you're the man now, dog

#1 Ronnie Bell. Eight targets, seven receptions, and the eighth was almost the catch of the year (decade?). In addition to that was a key component of Michigan's blizzard of WR screens. Is clearly the #1 receiver, which says something after a year layoff and re-emergence into a crowded WR room.

#2 JJ McCarthy. 15/18, 214 yards, one chunk run, opened up space for WR screens. Even grading on a UConn curve that's worthy of landing here.

#3 Kris Jenkins. Had one blowout suffered but racked up five tackles as a DT in limited snaps. Got off blocks and showed some explosion.

Honorable mention: Blake Corum did score five touchdowns, but almost all were one yard and this isn't fantasy football. This is KFaTAotW! AJ Henning had four catches and one notable punt return but coulda shoulda done better on his carry. Caden Kolesar took a punt off someone's foot. Junior Colson was everywhere on defense. Gemon Green had a PBU and was ruthless on opposition screens.

KFaTAotW Standings.

(points: #1: 8, #2: 5, #3: 3, HMs one each. Ties result in somewhat arbitrary assignments.)

13: JJ McCarthy (#1 Hawaii, #2 UConn)
11: Blake Corum (#2 CSU, #2 Hawaii, HM UConn)
10: Mazi Smith (#1 CSU, T3 Hawaii), Ronnie Bell (HM CSU, HM Hawaii, #1 UConn)
4: Junior Colson (#3 CSU, HM UConn)
3: Kris Jenkins (#3 UConn)
2: Mike Morris (T3 Hawaii), Kris Jenkins (T3 Hawaii), Roman Wilson (HM CSU, HM Hawaii)
1: Braiden McGregor (HM CSU), Eyabi Anoma (HM CSU), Derrick Moore (HM CSU), Jaylen Harrell (HM CSU), Rod Moore (HM CSU), Makari Paige (HM Hawaii), Rayshaun Benny (HM Hawaii), Mason Graham (HM Hawaii), Cornelius Johnson (HM Hawaii), Donovan Edwards (HM Hawaii), AJ Henning (HM UConn), Gemon Green (HM UConn), Caden Kolesar (HM UConn).

Who's Got It Better Than Us(?) Of The Week

AJ Henning goes Houdini.

It was coming. Now it is here. I think he's going to get another one this year.

Honorable mention: Various Blake Corum touchdowns. Caden Kolesar returns a punt to sender. McCarthy throws a rope to Luke Schoonmaker on the move.

?MARCUS HALL EPIC DOUBLE BIRD OF THE WEEK.

JJ McCarthy is tackled for loss on third and three, preventing Michigan from scoring touchdowns on all drives.

Honorable mention: Blizzard of TV timeouts at the beginning of the fourth quarter. Review does not overturn the Ronnie Bell non-catch on grounds of radness. Blocking goes AWOL on consecutive run plays.

9/10/2022 – Michigan 56, Hawaii 10 – 2-0

There's a certain point where you're just unreasonably invested in some guy making a simple throw against a very bad team. JJ McCarthy rolled out on his second drive and had Erick All in the flat. Hawaii's safety was flying up at McCarthy, because McCarthy ran as much as he passed in Michigan's opener. All was open, and all McCarthy had to do was not screw up an easy play.

He did not. He flipped the ball out to All, who picked up a first down. Hooray.

I mean, what else was left? He'd just thrown a (nearly) in-stride bomb. As soon as he came in against Colorado State he ran for a touchdown, juking a safety along the way. He throws outs on a line, with velocity you can hear. He is a wide array of talents in one package. And so then there's just one thing left: don't be weird. Please, please, please don't be weird.

Don't be really good at the hard things and turf every screen. Don't have exactly one velocity everything is thrown at. Don't spend most plays bugging out of clean pockets. Don't call all your offensive linemen "Scooter 1," "Scooter 2," and so forth and so on. Don't watch defensive ends tear hell for leather at the running back and hand it off anyway. Don't throw the ball short, unless you should. When you throw the ball long, either throw it to open guys or give your guys a chance even if they're covered. Check into all the right plays. Have a mind like a diamond and eyes that burn like cigarettes.

That sort of thing.

You know, just be MechaGodzilla, the quarterback. Be instantly great, three standard deviations above the mean. Don't be one of those weird guys in the middle of the bell curve. Just throw the ball to the tight end so he can run. And do it every time, without variation, unless the defense requires you to vary. As they inevitably will.

Be perfect. Be fucking perfect. Be an unassailable tower of precision and might. Do everything right and nothing wrong and if you do something wrong fix it immediately. Make cacio e pepe without the sauce breaking.

And JJ McCarthy said "…ok"?

[Barron]

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This is the point where you dump out the caveats because someone in the comments is going to go "actually it was just Hawaii," but no, not this time. Go ahead, guy in comments. I acknowledge that other teams aren't going to accidentally run zero coverage on first and ten. I acknowledge that Roman Wilson is seven times faster than any Rainbow Warrior. Now you acknowledge, buddy. You sit there and say "holy shit" softly to yourself, just once.

Yeah, that feels real good.

I HAVE SEEN THINGS BUDDY

I have seen John O'Korn come in against Purdue and look like GOD HIMSELF. I have seen the NUMBER ONE DEFENSE IN AMERICA give up sixty septillion points to Ohio State crossing routes. I HAVE SEEN A SHIMMERING IN THE DISTANCE THAT SLOWLY RESOLVES ITSELF INTO A QUARTERBACK OF SUCH UTTER PERFECTION HE BEATS NOTRE DAME'S HEAD IN DESPITE SPOTTING THEM A VERY SILLY TOUCHDOWN AND HAVING NO OFFENSIVE LINE AT ALL. I have seen the ending of several LSU games.

I have perceived! Many times! I have built an entire persona around perceiving and relating things!

I'm ready. I am ready to make that call, the call no one ever mentions unless you're wrong and then every time you breathe a 16-year-old Michigan State fan puts a screenshot of it on your forehead. Well, screw you, @oldtakesexposed. I ain't afraid of you.

JJ McCarthy is it.

I'm in. I'm sold. He's never going to throw an interception. He's going to average 15 yards an attempt. He is going to slip out of a sack by detaching one of his arms and regrow it at halftime. He's going to NYC next year. Hell, maybe this year. Whatever. Make an outlandish prediction. I endorse it. JJ McCarthy is going to make Nick Saban quit football. He's going to invent shoes. He's gonna make Pluto a planet again. It's all happening.

AWARDS

Known Friends and Trusted Agents Of The Week

touchdown [Patrick Barron]

you're the man now, dog

#1 JJ McCarthy. If Ronnie Bell had caught that slant and picked up 11 yards—and he was probably getting at least 20—McCarthy would have averaged 20 YPA. Also he ran the ball once for 16 yards. That'll do, pig. That'll do.

#2 Blake Corum. Like last week, Corum is sort of a default pick in a game where almost nobody got to do a lof of stuff. On the other hand, nearly 10 YPC on nine carries will do nicely.

#3(t) Mazi Smith, Kris Jenkins, Mike Morris. Folks, if you set aside RJ Moten's four Michigan's leading tacklers in this game were Caden Kolesar, Micah Pollard, Deuce Spurlock, Jaydon Hood, and Kenneth Grant. My kingdom for a game competitive enough that someone can actually earn a spot for doing more than one thing. Most of the front gets this because Hawaii's ground game was picking one guy to double and losing to the other two guys every time. Two points each to marginally distinguish them from the HMs.

Honorable mention: Ronnie Bell had a drop and a fumble that knocked him down here but also caught six balls. Cornelius Johnson and Roman Wilson both hit multiple big plays. Donovan Edwards had a personal touchdown drive. Rayshaun Benny and Mason Graham looked more or less like starters. Makari Paige nearly had an INT and had a nice PBU.

KFaTAotW Standings.

(points: #1: 8, #2: 5, #3: 3, HMs one each. Ties result in somewhat arbitrary assignments.)

10: Mazi Smith (#1 CSU, T3 Hawaii), Blake Corum (#2 CSU, #2 Hawaii)
8: JJ McCarthy (#1 Hawaii)
3: Junior Colson (#3 CSU)
2: Mike Morris (T3 Hawaii), Kris Jenkins (T3 Hawaii), Ronnie Bell (HM CSU, HM Hawaii), Roman Wilson (HM CSU, HM Hawaii),
1: Braiden McGregor (HM CSU), Eyabi Anoma (HM CSU), Derrick Moore (HM CSU), Jaylen Harrell (HM CSU), Rod Moore (HM CSU), Makari Paige (HM Hawaii), Rayshaun Benny (HM Hawaii), Mason Graham (HM Hawaii), Cornelius Johnson (HM Hawaii), Donovan Edwards (HM Hawaii).

Who's Got It Better Than Us(?) Of The Week

McCarthy rips the ball out of a mesh point and fires a laser to Ronnie Bell for an RPO touchdown.

Honorable mention: Ten of McCarthy's eleven other throws. Davis Warren fires an eyepopping dart to Max Bredeson. Mike Morris busts through for a sack.

MARCUS HALL EPIC DOUBLE BIRD OF THE WEEK.

People boo Cade McNamara. WTF.

Honorable mention: Rain delay. Hawaii rushing touchdown looks pretty bad for third stringers.