blake corum is mike hart but fast

Previously: The Story. Quarterback.

RUNNING BACK: RUN IT BACK

[Bolded player rules: not necessarily returning starter, but someone we've seen enough of that I'm no longer talking about their recruiting profile (much, anyway). Extant contributor.]

FEATURE BACK	Yr.	SHORT YARDAGE	Yr.	THIRD DOWN	YR.
Blake Corum	Sr.	Blake Corum	Sr.	Donovan Edwards	Jr.
Donovan Edwards	Jr.	Kalel Mullings	Jr.*	Blake Corum	Sr.
CJ Stokes	So.	Benjamin Hall	Fr.	CJ Stokes	So.
Benjamin Hall	Fr.	Alex Orji	Fr.*	Cole Cabana	Fr.

RATING: 5

There is no greater "Everything's coming up Milhous!" moment in recent Michigan football history than Blake Corum busting his knee the week before the Ohio State game, still beating Ohio State as a one-handed Donovan Edwards becomes a national star, and then getting Blake Goddamn Corum back for his senior season largely because he didn't win the Heisman on account of the knee.

Remember the days when Michigan couldn't find a running back capable of running through a dizzy toddler? Now we are entering the third straight season where the #2 guy would start on all but ~5 football teams in the country. In fact, if you take Dane Brugler's word for it the number of teams not named "Michigan" on which Donovan Edwards would not start is one: Wisconsin. His NFL draft rankings have Corum 1, Braelon Allen 2, and Edwards 3. Maybe there's a sophomore out there on Alabama or something, but: nah. This is the best backfield in America, and it's not real close.

What say you now, Mike Hart haters? Probably "bur bur bur bur duhhhhh." Get wrecked. Like opposition run defenses.

IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED

Last year's preview was rapturous about BLAKE CORUM. Perhaps never in the history of his preview series has a player been so thoroughly hyped:

ATTENTION MEDIA: did you know that Fred Jackson rejoined the Michigan football program this offseason? He's an analyst or somesuch. He's in the building. He is there for you, the quote-gathering media, to sidle up next to. Once you've sidled real good you can say "hey" or "psst," preferably in a large group. And then you can do this.

Anyway. BLAKE CORUM is the light and the truth. … Corum should push for All-American honors but probably end up behind at least a couple of the Henderson/Robinson/Vaughn trio when it comes to big honors.

This take was, somehow, pessimistic.

[AFTER THE JUMP: mea culpa]

Things discussed:

• Moving the Comerica Park fences: fine, but why do it AFTER Cabrera?!
• Blake Corum's return: Thank NIL that it's possible. Gonna be a Denard/Gardner/Braylon/Hart/Marlin whose name is etched in history.
• Jim Harbaugh's contract negotiation.
• Warde Manuel: Brian goes off. Sam clarifies it's a message board post that USA Today picked up on, and not everything in that contract negotiation timeline is correct.
• Seth: They're probably not arguing about the money but the buyout because Michigan needs a long-term commitment and Harbaugh wants a chance to take an NFL job.
• Solution: MAKE A DAMN DECISION!!!! You're all just losing value the longer this goes on. If Harbaugh's not going to say it's his last job, name a successor so when it does happen the program rolls on.

[Hit the JUMP for the player, and video and stuff]

There is a place. You are next to other people from opposing clans. Sometimes they say a thing. Then, you choose. You always choose. No matter what the circumstances are, or how you feel, you still have a choice. Michigan State had that choice at halftime. Patrick helpfully documented it. This is what happens in the Michigan tunnel when the hooting starts and nobody turns around to throw PB&Js:

Michigan and Michigan State, one of the most hated rivalries in the Big Ten… both headed to their respective locker rooms with civility in the Michigan Stadium tunnel ☺️ pic.twitter.com/FSt2ympyrn

— Pa‘trick-or-treat’ Barron (@BlueBarronPhoto) October 30, 2022

I know that noise, now. It is the same one from Kirk Herbstreit's video from last year's Ohio State game and the same one from the Penn State game and the same one from this video. The opposing team goes down the tunnel; Michigan is delayed; Michigan is released. And then there is a perfect thing. 125 persons, give or take, all collectively go "YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAH". No intelligible sentiments. Just a vibe. A vibe that is apparently driving opposition football teams insane. 

Because this is no different than what happens every week. The officials delay Michigan every time. To engage, you have to turn around. That's a choice. It's a choice two football teams made over the past year, but not Michigan State. They receive one point.

---------------------------------

I have bad news about ensuing decisions.

It is also a choice to respond to something someone said by getting them on the ground and kicking them in the head or swinging your helmet at them. I wish this doesn't have to be said, but evidently it very much does: nothing Gemon Green or Ja'Den McBurrows could have done with their mouths warrants aggravated assault. Their major sin was not being from the state and thinking that a Michigan State program that was just blasted off the field could be trusted to not beat them with helmets and cleats. They thought this was a normal game against normal people, like it was against Penn State:

They were wrong, and now they know.

Everyone knows. This is who Michigan State is and will continue to be. MSU has posted some vague suspensions, probably because the Big Ten has made it clear that "nothing" will not fly as a punishment. The fired president of the university issued a boilerplate apology that is remarkable only in its source. Even that statement seemingly enraged the already-enraged board. Six hours later the board announced that Stanley's interim successor would be named at noon today. Maybe it'll be John Engler, since it's time to circle the wagons again.

Meanwhile the rest of the MSU media sphere is either downplaying the post-game incidents, blaming the people not swinging the helmets, or straight up approving. Rivals's Jim Comparoni wrote an article blaming Jim Harbaugh—last seen not kicking anyone—that Ace has helpfully deconstructed. Here's a taste from MSU's apologist-in-chief:

Are you going to believe him when Harbaugh tells us McBurrows and Green were in the tunnel because they had to go to the bathroom?

— Jim Comparoni (@JimComparoni) October 30, 2022

Radio host Rico Beard said nothing in the aftermath except to retweet someone saying "now u want to cry." Former MSU TE Chris Baker:

Poke a random thread on the wretched hive of scum and villany that is the largest MSU message board on the internet and you'll get people who are 95% furious that Mel Tucker issued the same sort of boilerplate apology:

Mel Tucker is satisfied with his 95 million and has no fight left in him. Looked absolutely clownish making sure he shook Jim’s hand at the end of the game even though Jim had no time for him. And now confessing remorse without questioning Michigan’s role. He is broken. …

Stanley can choke on his mask and get fukced. GTFO already. …

If we do have a PR firm they are pathetic. The school needs to find a top notch one asap … Until we do that nothing will change in recruiting or perception of the athletics and school as a whole

I promise you that no one inside that program has an ounce of remorse this morning. The only ones who regret anything are the guys who wrote Mel Tucker a 95 million dollar check because he lucked into a Doak Walker winner buried on the Wake Forest depth chart.

Gemon Green is pressing charges, and he should, because he was assaulted by a program that has absolutely no ethics not imposed upon them by outside forces. It's not four guys who are the problem. There were dozens of Michigan State players and officials in that tunnel, and exactly none of them tried to intervene. I've been saying this for years. This is who they are.

But anyway. Bye.

Michigan has bigger things to do this year than listen to little brother say the tunnel was too narrow and Jaden McBurrows shouldn't have been skipping.

-------------------------------------------

Nothing changes about the tunnel. It's been like that for 95 years and will be like that for another 95. If there's weaponized hooting now, so be it. It's not up to Michigan to respond like functional adults when someone does something mildly annoying. This our vibe now. Take the L, and get the fuck out of our tunnel.

AWARDS

Known Friends and Trusted Agents Of The Week

[Barron]

you're the man now, dog

#1 Blake Corum. 177 yards on 33 carries and was one ankle tackle away from breaking a couple of long ones. Slipped out of tackle after tackle, beefed up when it was short yardage, would not go down to the first guy.

#2 Kris Jenkins. Major factor in Michigan's two fourth and one stops, and singlehandedly rescued a couple of other plays in situations where it looked like Michigan was beat by alignment. First among many in quest to hold down MSU's ground game.

#3 Jake Moody. Night would have been a lot more nervous if Moody hadn't gone 5/5 on field goals, including a 54-yarder.

Honorable mention: Mazi Smith also had a hand in the first fourth down stop and helped stone the MSU run game. JJ McCarthy's timely scrambles converted a few important first downs. Luke Schoonmaker had a productive day as a blocker and receiver. Rod Moore helped shut down the one thing that worked for MSU and prevented any dignity drive from scoring with an interception. The Offensive Line kept McCarthy clean (no sacks) and paved the way for a 276 yard rushing output.

KFaTAotW Standings.

(points: #1: 8, #2: 5, #3: 3, HMs one each. Ties result in somewhat arbitrary assignments.)

35: Blake Corum (#2 CSU, #2 Hawaii, HM UConn, #1 Maryland, #2 Iowa. HM Indiana, T2 PSU, #1 MSU)
20: JJ McCarthy (#1 Hawaii, #2 UConn, HM Maryland, HM Iowa, #3 Indiana, HM PSU, HM MSU)
16: Ronnie Bell (HM CSU, HM Hawaii, #1 UConn, #2 Indiana, HM PSU), Mike Morris (T3 Hawaii, HM Maryland, #1 Iowa, T1 Indiana, #3 PSU)
13: Mazi Smith (#1 CSU, T3 Hawaii, HM Maryland, HM Iowa, HM MSU), Kris Jenkins (#3 UConn, T3 Hawaii, HM Iowa, T1 Indiana, #2 MSU)
12: The Offensive Line (#3 Iowa, #1 PSU, HM MSU)
7: Gemon Green (HM UConn, T2 Maryland, HM PSU)
5: DJ Turner (T2 Maryland), Junior Colson (#3 CSU, HM UConn, HM PSU), Luke Schoonmaker (T3 Maryland, HM Iowa, HM Indiana, HM MSU)
4: Eyabi Okie (HM CSU, HM Iowa, T1 Indiana),  Donovan Edwards (HM Hawaii, T2 PSU), Jake Moody (HM PSU, #3 MSU).
3: Derrick Moore (HM CSU, T1 Indiana), Jaylen Harrell (HM CSU, T1 Indiana), Mason Graham (HM Hawaii, HM Iowa, HM Indiana), Rod Moore (HM CSU, HM Indiana, HM MSU)
2: Roman Wilson (HM CSU, HM Hawaii), Max Bredeson (T3 Maryland), Joel Honigford (T3 Maryland), Mike Sainristil (HM Maryland, HM Indiana)
1: Braiden McGregor (HM CSU), Makari Paige (HM Hawaii), Rayshaun Benny (HM Hawaii), Cornelius Johnson (HM Hawaii), , AJ Henning (HM UConn), Caden Kolesar (HM UConn), RJ Moten (HM Maryland),

Who's Got It Better Than Us(?) Of The Week

MSU runs six plays in the third quarter for a total of eight yards as Michigan puts the game to bed.

Honorable mention: Moody hits a 54-yarder. Snap hijinks result in a turnover. Corum is eventually the recipient on a very complicated play from the two that scores. MSU OT takes an incredibly stupid penalty on their July drive, terminating it.

?MARCUS HALL EPIC DOUBLE BIRD OF THE WEEK.

Michigan State decides to go American History X on a couple of Michigan players in the tunnel after the game.

Honorable mention: Nearly back-to-back mossings equal a quick MSU touchdown and their only lead of the game. Cornelius Johnson fumbles on Michigan's first drive. A rad Ronnie Bell catch is overturned and Michigan refuses to go for it on fourth and three, so Brad Robbins doesn't get a second straight game without a punt.