Sing Along: Exodus Three
In ancient days during the quarterback drought of 2008, there came a child called Kevin Newsome from Old Virginia bearing news that he shalt accept a scholarship offer from the University of Michigan, and there was much rejoicing among the People of the Wolverine for the wise men of recruiting looked into his future and saw his head anointed by many stars.
But then came the dark years when every first-born quarterback among the Wolverines was slain. To escape the same fate, the child Newsome was put unto a basket and floated down the river, where he was found in the Valley of Happiness and raised in the court of the ancient and Great Paterno.
However as he grew older Kevin Newsome saw his brothers -- even the walk-on -- anointed before him, and wondered about his fate. And finally he decided he must leave Happy Valley and seek his fortunes. One day he came upon a shrubbery engulfed in flame, and out of this shrubbery he heard a voice...
(HIT PLAY)
Go down, Newsome, way down in Happy Valley Penn State land.
Tell old -- Paterno...
Let my QBs go!!!!
(da dum da doobie doobie, da dum da dum)
When McGloin came starter his backups said:
Let my QBs go!
They sat so much they could not stand.
Let my QBs go!
(So the Lord said) Go down, Newsome, way down in State College Penn State land.
Tell old....Paterno....to let my QBs go!
(da dum da doobie dum, da dum da doobie dum)
So Bolden went to Happy Land
Let my QBs go!
He couldn't make Paterno understand,
Let my QBs go!
(Yes the Lord said) Go down, Bolden, way down in University Park Penn State land..
Tell old....Paterno....to let my QBs go!
(da dum da doobie, da dum a doobie, da dum da doobie dum dum)
Thus spoke Paul Jones, bold freshman said:
Let my QBs go!
Your first-born son's not right in the head.
Let my QBs go!
('Cause the Lord said) Go down, Paul Jones, way down in Beaver Stadium Penn State land..
Tell old....Paterno....
Let my QBs go!
And Paterno said:
No! No! No! I will not let them go!
I very much enjoyed this. Thank you.
Thanks
Weird. Too out there for me, which is par for the course for MIsopogon posts. I am not from a house of learn-ed doctors.
This is a reference to the Bible bro. Nothing to do with his PhD.
All you need to know is Paterno's QBs keep trying to transfer and like the Pharoah from Exodus Paterno wants them to stay and build his pyramid or something.
Newsome was a strongly rumored transfer at the end of last year but then that fizzled out for some reason.
Bolden asked for a transfer and was denied -- Paterno said he could ask again after Spring, and apparently that worked. He's battling McGloin for the starting gig.
Paul Jones is the true freshman and academically inelgigible.
And as of today Newsome is trying to transfer again. We'll see if he needs to bring the plagues to get out.
...you've never seen "Ferris Bueller's Day Off"?
This made me laugh
That made my Thursday afternoon a little better. Thanks dude!
But I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me
He's just a poor boy from a poor family
Spare him his life from this monstrosity
Easy come easy go - will you let me go
Bismillah! No - we will not let you go - let him go
Bismillah! We will not let you go - let him go
Bismillah! We will not let you go - let me go
Will not let you go - let me go (never)
Never let you go - let me go
Never let me go - ooo
No, no, no, no, no, no, no -
Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me
for me
for me
So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye
So you think you can love me and leave me to die
Oh baby - can't do this to me baby
Just gotta get out - just gotta get right outta here
Ooh yeah, ooh yeah
Nothing really matters
Anyone can see
Nothing really matters - nothing really matters to me
Anyway the wind blows...
Who then shall go and seek an audience with Old Paterno? Maybe the Lord will cast every B1G team upon Happy Valley for a hundred years to humble the Prideful Paterno!
Especially on another day the stock market's taking a dump. My advice is to stay on this site and avoid the financial websites like the plague. Too depressing.
Anyone who can parody a classic like that, especially an arrangement by Louis Armstrong, is tops in my book. Well done!
The song predates Armstrong, it was simply his recording that made it more accessible to the entire nation.
We sang this in church a few months ago. It really is an awesome song.
Armstrong wasn't even the one who popularized it across the country - that was the Paul Robeson recording, with that really deep "let my people guo." I could only find the Armstrong version to link to for free online.
The song itself is really old, sung in the fields by Americans enslaved and converted to Christianity throughout the 18th and 19th centuries. If you take out the funny stuff and sing it straight you'll note it's a cadence song, where a leader sings a part then everyone joins in for the easy stuff, just like sea shanties. Since the subject matter and the form are both really old, I wouldn't be surprised if the song itself is too. But certainly it was most popular among slaves in the U.S. Imagine singing this and swinging a hoe and that's probably what our ancestors were doing.
Fate hasn't been kind to either Newsom or Beaver,at this point in their collective careers. Michigan's qb situation has me feeling so warm & fuzzy...
Was never sold on Newsome as a qb...even when R2 was recruiting him.
Newsome was choice 1, Beaver choice 2, they left and Tate was choice 3 and Denard was the guy we got at the end to give us two QB candidates. Thank you, Kevin and Beave.
But I'm not a fan of this post. What happened to just telling us the facts?
I'm sorry, I'm sure your a nice guy Misopogon, but do we need the lyrics and the hyperbole (talking about ancient quarterbacks).
What was wrong with just saying "Kevin Newsome, former U-M commit is transfering"?
Between that and your Bill Simmons-esque diaries posts, I feel like my head is going to explode.
Okay, that's all I got. Enjoy negging me everyone.
Do yourself the favor and take the pole out of your ass!
Then loosen up and take a deep breathe.
bill simmons-esque...as an insult?
You aren't a fan of this blog. I can go anywhere to find out Newsome is looking to transfer. I go to mgoblog to find out and be entertained in the process.
There sure were a lot of "journeymen" in the QB class of 2009 - Forcier, Beaver, Newsome. Thankfully Denard did not join that list.
Very Cool, My work day is now over. People keep coming into my office to read this. Instant Classic.
If you're the person depicted in your avatar, you really need to get back to work.
Newsome has always been a TE if he knows it or not. At least that's what the PSU crowd said when he was a Michigan commit.
to ward off any further transfers.
This post is awesome! Creative references and I love the song selection. Great work
Well that was stellar.
Brilliant!
So, with your final line, I guess you could go for the preschool version:
Oh listen, oh listen, oh listen, King Paterno.
Oh listen, oh listen, please let my QB's go.
They want to go away
They want to play some day
Oh Paterno, Oh Paterno,
What do You Say?
NO NO NO, I WILL NOT LET THEM GO!
August 5th, 2011 at 11:22 AM ^
Yep!
Hilarious.
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